9:36: On the other hand, the Cirque crew are pretty impressive with the stagecraft. You wouldn't see Fozzie doing those kinds of flips. And that performance perfectly captured the experiencing of going to the movies today. Especially at the AMC Empire in Times Square.
9:37: It's a good thing they went out of their way to tell us that this music was by Danny Elfman because we wouldn't have been immediately clued in by the use of children's voices or anything...
9:38: Well, that performance was technically impressive and, better yet, short. We call that a win! Though we're not entirely sure what the point was.
9:39: Oscar is 84. That explains all of Crystal's material.
9:41: This Robert Downey Jr. bit is falling flatter than The Soloist. Is he approaching his Ricky Gervais tipping point?
9:42: If that was his audition reels for The Descendants 2, he failed. Unless he's going for the Matthew Lillard role.
9:43: Anyway, the Best Documentary Oscar goes to Undefeated, another Harvey Weinstein joint. Huh. We were pretty sure Paradise Lost 3 would nab it, because those movies helped free three guys from jail and all. Guess football really is King in America.
9:44: Harsh man -- they didn't just play the doc winners off, they cut their mics! Yikes. That doesn't seem sporting.
9:45: Chris Rock auditioning for next year's hosting gig during his Best Animated Feature presentation. This is funnier than the time he actually hosted the Oscars. (And better than anything from this year's host.)
9:47: And the winner is... Rango! Aww yeah. Best thing Gore Verbinski has ever done, hands down. We even forgive him The Mexican and At World's End. But not the second or third Pirates of the Caribbean.
9:51: Brave looks truly great. We're calling it now -- that's next year's Animated Feature winner, folks.
9:52: Poor Melissa McCarthy -- first she loses her Oscar and now she has to pretend to flirt with Billy Crystal. We're not sure which is worse. Actually we do... Crystal all the way.
9:53: Is Emma Stone deliberately making fun of Anne Hathaway's over-enthusiasm from last year? If so, it's totally mean, but also totally funny. (Though not as funny as that enormous bow at the top of her outfit.)
9:54: Okay Academy, this Visual Effects group is your absolute last chance to honor the Harry Potter franchise. Go on... prove you're in touch with real moviegoers!