Weeds

Episode Report Card
Wing Chun: B- | Grade It Now!
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A.K.A. The Plant

Kate & Anna McGarrigle do a French cover of "Little Boxes" (Petites Boîtes?), and then we're with the Hodes campaign. Celia pulls some buttons and pamphlets out of the trunk of her car, and then crabs to Nancy that the only family in the neighbourhood to do something original chose "...this": a lawn full of "classical" statues, including one of the wolf nursing Romulus and Remus at her teats, plunked smack down right in the middle of the front lawn. It's spectacular. Celia says that if she's elected, she'll push through a fine for people like this, and keep levying it until they can't pay their mortgages. On that note, Nancy heads off to "tell the neighbours how enlightened" Celia is.

Celia goes to the front door behind the sculpture garden, tells the pretty young woman inside how much she loves the statuary, and tries to give her a pamphlet. The homeowner won't even take it, saying that she's going to vote for Doug. Celia, disgusted, asks why, and the woman replies that she approves of Doug's slogan: "Change just brings problems." She closes the door on Celia, who mutters, "Fucking immigrants."

In the driveway, Celia checks in with Nancy. The people Nancy approached are Doug loyalists, too, but Nancy tells Celia not to worry: like most Americans, they probably won't vote. Up the block, Isabel, standing with a woman, calls Celia over. Nancy drifts off, wondering if she can get away with only hitting one door today.

Celia introduces herself to Isabel's new friend, a Lane Cassidy. Celia warmly introduces herself, thinking Lane's curious about her candidacy, but Lane is interested in Isabel: "She's perfect." Celia suspiciously asks what she's perfect for. "Modelling," says Lane excitedly. Celia narrows her eyes and spits that Lane is "just cruel." She tries to usher Isabel away, but Lane explains that she works for Huskeroos. Ignoring Isabel's excitement, Celia announces that Isabel will not be modelling "fat clothes." "They're just roomier!" chirps Lane. Celia is still unconvinced, but Lane cheerfully hands over her card anyway. I love that they called the brand "Huskeroos," too. In Canada, there's a plus-size chain called "MXM," which...really?

Anyway, Celia and Isabel start fighting while, down the block, Nancy and her ubiquitous iced coffee beverage are getting a call from Peter. He wants to get together that night, but Nancy cute-complains that he's not giving her enough notice. There's an outdated reference to The Rules, and then one date gets nixed because Nancy has Movie Night with Shane, and another because Peter's going undercover for a week. He tells her that when he comes back, she's going to date him. "Yes sir," she agrees, and they hang up.

Back to the Hodeses. Isabel declares that she wants to model. Celia tells her to get an eating disorder and they'll talk about it. Isabel demands a ride back to school, and Celia tells her to run there -- then maybe she won't get approached by strangers to model plus-size clothes. Isabel stomps off, and Celia catches up with Nancy and moves on to interrogating her, asking if the call was from a guy. Nancy wearily dodges the question, and Celia clarifies that she hopes it was a dude -- she thinks it's about time Nancy started dating. She starts throwing out options from the neighbourhood, but Nancy rejects them as being too old, gross, or gay. Celia says that the options for women their age are limited, and instead of correcting her, Nancy asks how things are going with Dean. Celia, resigned, says that he's a loser, and built like a Cadbury Creme Egg covered in hair. Worst Easter ever. But, on the plus side, Dean is tidy and has a good job.

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Weeds

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