Alias
A Higher Echelon

Episode Report Card
Erin: C+ | Grade It Now!
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Bring Me A Higher Love!

Moving on.

Suffice it to say, the op tech team does its job and does it well, because Jack's puckered ass is safe in all the locations that SD-6 might possibly check out. Jack charges off, leaving Vaughn to look after him with an extra forehead furrow or two. Hot Agent Craig shows up and, instead of challenging Vaughn to a skins against skins basketball match, hands over Will's psych profile. Vaughn instructs Hot Agent Craig to run protocol and bring Will in. Whoo! Will's almost an agent!

Jack comes charging through again, demanding of some tech guy, "What about surveillance footage?" Tech Guy blathers and blithers on about rotoscoping and frame rates and green screens. Nutshell? Jack's placed on a hotel videotape via some geeky gadget-y tools. Jack's all, okay, I want to go over everything and make sure we're solid. Vaughn's all, dude? We're covered. I think you're being a little bit -- Jack cuts him off and tells him that thinking simply isn't good enough. "I want to know," he bites. Vaughn wisely tucks his balls away and replies, "You're right." "I want to see the plane tickets," Jack huffs, walking off. Vaughn follows his future father-in-law like a little blond girly-girl.

Ho Ho Ho Chi Minh City. Syd enters some building and introduces herself to the guard as "Nina Bales." She looks fabulous in this scene, all black eye make-up and messy bun and black suit. Veddy nice. A couple of seconds later, Dixon's on Syd's com, saying something about accessing the system and being "in" during mid-presentation. Yeah, I don't know what he's talking about either.

In a darkened auditorium, Syd's making a presentation to a bunch of Vietnamese military dudes. Then, as the projector in front of her gets switched on, we flash back to The Conference Room Of Endless Expositions where Dixon, neatly stepping into Inspector Dingus's shoes, explains just how the little projector works. And, if you thought Jack and the whole "Permanent Prints of Perpetuity" thing was implausible, wait'll you get a load of this one.

Basically, Syd just has to press a button, and the projector emits a high-intensity pulse strobe light that flashes at the same frequency as human brain waves. "Effectively rendering the targets unconscious," he says. Whuh? Yeah, that's what I said too. Syd's all, so -- what? This means I can grab the shit I'm supposed to and be back before these morons wake up? Dix is all, pretty much. For three minutes. Any longer than that, and they'll wake up and your ass will be grass. Oh, and you have to wear these special glasses that we borrowed from Mary on Joe Millionaire. They'll keep you from passing out too, and her attention-grabbing antics got her bony butt tossed off the show after the first episode so she certainly won't need them anymore.

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Alias

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