Alias
Alias

Episode Report Card
Erin: B- | 1234 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
Rachel went to São Paulo and all we got was this lousy episode.

Down below, a vehicle approaches, and Caroline comments that they're ahead of schedule. A guy removes a tarp from the back of the vehicle and Marshall gets a read on the weapon as it's uncovered. It's a micropulse bomb that probably has a 20-mile blast radius. Another car shows up, and Jack says, "I thought he was showing up alone." "So did I," says Caroline. From the Apple Store, Syd recognizes someone on the screen as "Masari," and Getty pipes up that Masari is a member of the RLF, which, of course, is some random terrorist organization. Syd gets on the horn to Jack and tells him that the dudes down below aren't MI:6 agents and that the dude is Masari and this whole thing is an ambush. At that precise moment, Masari's men below start shooting everyone and Caroline goes to grab the tracker device and then the screens go to snow back at the Apple Store. That's because men with guns have come upon Caroline and Jack and have decided to take them to a little place they call Kidnap Village.

Everyone at the Apple Store scrambles to find out what happened to Jack and Caroline. Sloane enters and heads right over to Sydney and she fills him in on what went down in Spain. Sloane surmises that, because the MI:6 meet was supposed to take place at 2:38 AM and Masari showed up at 2:17 AM, the double agent never had a chance to even put his hands on the weapon. Sloane asks Sydney how they got the intel on the meet and Syd says that Rachel intercepted a transmission. "Well," says Sloane, "maybe she wasn't the only one."

Conference Room of Endless Expositions. Sark's visage appears on the Wall of TVs as Sloane explains that Sark was in the same hotel at the same time as Rachel. Rachel looks like she's just been slapped in the face with a three-day-old seal flipper sandwich. "Who is this guy?" asks Getty. "Kidnapper, extortionist, murderer," says Syd. "The list goes on." All the more reason that Sark should have worn, say, AT LEAST A FAKE MOUSTACHE? Dude's a wanted man and he can't even bother to wear a HAT? Lord. Syd goes on to say that Sark used to be tied to the Covenant and SD-6, but that now he mostly works for himself. "Freelance," says Rachel with tears in her eyes. Syd catches this comment and immediately understands what's going on.

Alias

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