Episode Report Card
Erin: C+ | 2 USERS: B+
Rachel went to São Paulo and all we got was this lousy episode.

Down in the prison area, a guard runs to the door after Dix yells at him to open it. Dix promptly shoots him dead and he, Getty, and Rachel enter. Dix orders Rachel to cover the entrance as he and Getty run off to get Jack and Caroline. They come upon a staff of guards outside the cell and Getty tosses a gas grenade into their midst. It goes off and he and Dix shoot the shit out of all the guards. Damn. Getty opens the door to the cell and Jack immediately says that Caroline needs medical attention. "You don't look so good yourself," quips Getty. Dix says that an extraction team is standing by and that he'll call for them. Getty gets on comms to Rachel and tells her that they have Jack and Caroline but that Sark and Masari are still missing. Rachel cocks her gun and heads off to find them. She opens up a door and gets an "oh shit" look on her face. She calls Sydney and tells her that her father's alive, but that they have another problem. That's when we see that Sark has been chained to the micropulse bomb and that it's been set to go off in about eight minutes. Oh shit, indeed.

Syd and Marshall decide that there's not enough time to evacuate the area, so they'll have to talk Rachel through dismantling the bomb. Rachel moves over to it. Marshall tells Rachel to unscrew the front panel. "Unscrew it?" she hisses. "Unscrew it with what?" "Might I suggest something sharp?" snits Sark. Rachel gives him a look and then grabs a readily accessible letter opener on the desk. "So," she says, "what happened?" "I overestimated my friendship with Masari," says Sark. "He assumed I was betraying him and he took the money and he left." "Oh," says Rachel. "So, then, he knows you pretty well." "Mmm," says Sark, nodding his head. Hee.

Rachel gets into the panel and Marshall blabbers at her what she needs to do and Syd pipes in her two cents and it doesn't really matter because OF COURSE she dismantles the bomb. The only highlights of this scene are the constant nattering between Sark and Rachel and Sark's growing discomfort at how clueless Rachel is and how that cluelessness may very well kill him. Heh. Rachel ably handles the wires inside the panel, and she's about to cut the one that will dismantle the bomb when Sark goes, "Wait. If that's the wrong wire…" "I thought you liked risks," she snits at him. "I also like my body," says Sark. "And, as I recall, you do too." HA! Rachel just glares at him and cuts the wire, but the clock keeps counting down. She tells Marshall that it's still armed and he says that's okay, she just needs to disable another wire.

"Don't you want to get Dixon?" asks Sark. "No offense, but you haven't shown the best judgment lately." Hee. Rachel finds the wire and tells Marshall she's got it. "Okay," he says, "that should work." "Should or will?" hisses Syd. "Should?" says Marshall, looking totally clueless. Rachel lets out a breath and Sark squinches his eyes shut, getting ready for death. Rachel suddenly looks up and calmly says to Sark, "Just so we're clear, you approached me. You were the one who was stupid enough to let me into your room and afterwards? You were the one that wanted to cuddle." HEE! She cuts the wire, the bomb goes dark, and everyone breathes a sigh of relief. "That was spectacular, Rachel," says Sydney. Sark gives Rachel a look that would indicate that he agrees with Sydney. "About what you just heard --" says Syd to Marshall. "Don't know, don't wanna know," he volleys back. Heeeeee.

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