Alias
Endgame

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Ding Dong, Mrs. Dixon's Dead

And before you can say it, EW!

Ovary Electric. Will and Francinator are smooching on the sofa. Ooh. Bradley Cooper looks like a good kisser. Dayum. Suddenly, Will separates himself from her, and even though he's fully dressed and Francinator's in a negligee, he announces that he has to go take a shower. The hell? Oh, and he's holding a bowl of cereal. The whuh? So, what, they woke up, Will got dressed, poured out some Froot Loops, parked it on the sofa, Francinator made the moves, and now, NOW he's taking a shower? What in the FUCK is going on around here?

Oh, whatever. While Will's in the plot device -- erm, I mean, "shower" -- Francinator does something funky with his cell phone. Once she's done, she evilly looks around the apartment, evilly reclines back into the sofa, and evilly continues sipping her coffee. She's evil. Did you get that?

Oops Center. Will's doodling on some papers at his desk. He gets up and smacks right into Marshall. Marshall, of course, being, well, Marshall, immediately engages in some oral diarrhea and just yammers at Will about topics ranging from being the new guy to parking way the hell far away to nearby gyms. Will's saved from any more verbal dribble when his cell phone rings. He tries to politely excuse himself, but Marshall just stands there like, "Oh, hey, you go ahead! I'll wait." Then Will more bluntly tells Marshall to get the hell out of there and Marshall skitters off, asking Will to have lunch with him some time. Aw. Marshall lurves Will.

Will takes the call, and it's Francinator. She's pretending that her computer's down and she needs him to look up a recipe for her. Oh, this is really stupid. Will pushes his glasses up onto the bridge of his nose (sigh...nerd sexy...sigh...) and asks her what the name of the site is. "www.bouillabaissecentral.com," she says. What? WHAT? Are they kidding with this shit? And what is up with Francie and bouillabaisse? Isn't that one of the first recipes she made Syd taste at her restaurant way back in the beginning? So, like, if she's made it once, don't you think she, I don't know, ALREADY KNOWS HOW TO MAKE IT? They couldn't have made it like, gumbo or fricassee or shirred eggs or something? Anything would have been better than fucking BOUILLABAISSE. Grrr. So, as Will logs into the computer, Francinator's monitoring his access. While she's talking to him, she gains access to the system itself and locates the Tuscany footage. She gives an evil little smile. By the way, Francinator's evil. Were you aware of that?

Spain. Favored Leisure Land Of Goya, Picasso, Dali, And A Little-Known Raging Alcoholic By The Name Of Hemingway. Syd's chilling out in some alley when a car pulls up. Vaughn gets out, and they kiss and hug. Vaughn's all, "How much time do we have?" "Twelve minutes," says Syd. "Did you bring gear?" "Did I bring gear?" quips Vaughn. He opens up the trunk of the car, and he and Syd outfit themselves with the latest in Super-Sexy Spy technology.

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Alias

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