Alias
Hourglass

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Sloane's Dead! Long Live Sloane!

Syd stalks up and sort of snottily goes, "What is it? Your message said it was important." "You were right," says Vaughn, making us all wonder just what's underneath his slightly undone collar. I mean, really. Prettiest male neck in the business, people. Syd's all, oh, right, was I? About what? Your wife being a traitor or you being a blind idiot? Vaughn's all, both, all right? BOTH. "Lauren's the mole," says Vaughn with more than a trace of bitterness. "She works for the Covenant." And you can totally tell here that Syd's like, "Oh, shit. And I've been all snotty and stuff. Dammit. DAMMIT." She kind of looks down at her feet like, "I was right. And that's awesome. But he looks pissed. And that sucks. Aw." And, secretly, she's probably wondering if this means they can have sex sooner rather than later. I'm sure he's wondering the same thing. Really, wouldn't you?

Jack wants to know if Vaughn has proof. Vaughn just kind of nods. Dude. Red and black wig. Easy. Vaughn says he should have known. Syd just pipes up that they should talk to Dixon, figure out how to handle this. "Oh, I know how to handle this," snits Vaughn. Hee. "You'll act like nothing's changed," says Jack. "Okay, what's Plan B?" snaps Vaughn. "'Cause that's NOT gonna happen." HEE. I like Pissed!Vaughn almost as much as I like Subtly!Sexy!Vaughn. At least, he's better than Moany!Vaughn or Blindly!Devoted!Vaughn. This whole scene fucking rocks. Jack tells Vaughn that Lauren can't detect the slightest alteration in their relationship, or they'll lose their tracking on the Covenant. He goes on to say that he'll alert Dixon and secure the Agency and limit Lauren's access to classified documents. "Okay, STOP!" says Vaughn. "My wife betrayed me! She betrayed all of us! You can't expect me to pretend that never happened." "I'm not sure you have a choice," counters Jack. "And why's that?" twits Vaughn. "Because you're the one that married her," purrs Jack in this hilarious tone. Oooh. Someone hand Vaughn some aloe vera and a cold compress because boyfriend just got burrrrrned! Hee! Then there's this great moment of silence where Vaughn just shuts the hell up and purses his lips, Syd kind of looks at him like, "Yeah, dude. I feel you. But you still married her. Heh," and Jack just stands there wondering if it would be acceptable to smack Vaughn around just a little bit, you know, for fun!

Oops Center. Vaughn's sitting at his desk, writing. Huh. I had no idea he was a lefty. That means he's very artistic, you know. And bad at math. Which, of course, means nothing because I'm very artistic but also bad at math and I'm a righty. So, you know, whatever. So, anyway, Vaughn's at his desk. Moronen walks up and says that she missed him this morning, and then she plants an entirely inappropriate kiss on his lips. All we see are his eyes as she does this and they're like, "EW! Traitor kiss! Traitor kiss!" God, he's good. She pulls away and he tells her that he got up early and went to the gym. Syd's watching them from across the room as Jack walks up behind her and joins in watching the show. Moronen blathers something about them falling back into their lives or something, and Vaughn does an excellent job of acting like he agrees with her. Then Moronen reminds him that he agreed to go to counseling with her awhile ago; would he consider going now? Vaughn readily agrees. From across the office, Syd says, "After thirty years, you still live with your wife's betrayal. Will he?" Jack looks at Vaughn and Moronen. "Absolutely," he says, almost smugly. Hey there, Jack. Being cuckolded by your hot Russian spy wife ain't exactly something to be proud of. Methinks someone has to LET IT GO.

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Alias

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