I See Dead People

Episode Report Card
Erin: A | 1 USERS: B
A chip off the old ɉlodie

Previously on Alias: Sloane killed Nadia with a table, SydAnna killed Élodie with a knife, and I killed my brain cells with a slow and steady stream of liquid nitrogen martinis. Straight up!

We start off the hoots and hilarity at Nadia's funeral, where Syd is giving a heartfelt memorial to her half-sister. The Appleseed Gang is all in attendance, minus one Agent Weiss because he's off filming a pilot or showing up in yet another JJ Abrams production. While Sydney speaks lovingly of Nadia, we watch as a medical examiner begins his autopsy of Élodie. It's a nice juxtaposition: the love surrounding Nadia and the lack of it surrounding Élodie. While the M.E. is cutting her up, he discovers something and shines the light down to get a better look. And I was wrong in the recaplet; he's not cutting into her head, he's cutting into her chest. I don't know why I thought it was the head; obviously, I should never be allowed to perform neurosurgery on anyone.

The M.E. removes a rather large microchip from Élodie's body and we switch to Nadia's coffin as Sydney lays a lily down on her chest. And, yeah, I totally thought she was going to suddenly slap her eyes open at that point and be all, "Gotcha!" But alas, it was not meant to be. Nadia's truly dead. Or, you know, as dead as anyone ever is on this show. Dix walks up as Syd says out loud that she can't believe she trusted Sloane again after all he's done. Dix tries to comfort her, saying that they all trusted him. Syd says that Nadia didn't and that now Syd has to live with the fact that Nadia wasn't buying Sloane's story but Syd totally was and Syd actually convinced Nadia to give him a second chance, thereby basically sending Nadia to her death. "I showed him compassion," says Syd. "I won't make that mistake again." God, I hope not. The man's a sadistic little dork, Sydney. Let him have it!

Distant Castle of Rambaldi-Loving Freaks. Peyton is swaggering so hard down a hallway that she's practically leaving dents in the plaster. Also? What's up with her hair? Back when we didn't know she was so deep into Prophet Five, she had her hair pulled back in ponytails and little to no makeup on. Now that she's a baddie, she's all curled and flounced and looking rather hottish. If becoming eeeevil is what it takes to be hot, I'm about a fountain pen and a dotted line away from signing up for that shit. Peyton stops and asks a guard if "he" has asked for anything yet. The guard says "he" has just asked for a pitcher of water. Peyton enters the room. Papers and random Rambaldi-esque crap are strewn across a desk. Page 47 just sits in the middle of it all.

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