Episode Report Card
Erin: A | 1 USERS: B+
Papa, can you hear me? No, seriously. PAPA?

Vaughn calls Syd over and shows her some entries he's found in a small book. Body temp, blood cell counts -- Jack's been monitoring his vitals. They see something called "alkylating agent" written next to an amount of 20x. Also? Jack has the writing of a serial killer. Syd goes off to seek out more info and finds a mother lode in the bathroom. Approximately forty-seven bottles of pills, some adhesive strips, a scalpel, and a waste bin spilling over with used syringes. Oh, damn. Did someone have a party and invite Perry Farrell again? I mean, lord. That man can't clean up after himself for shit. The Strings of This Does Not Bode Well For Our Daddy take us over to the Apple Store.

Marshall comes scooting through, all excited that he gets to run an initial analysis on Hydrosec. Nadia interrupts his fervor and hands him a sketch of Nerdy McSpyBoy. Marshall says he'll run a biometric match on it. As they discuss whether or not this will work on a sketch, Elena shows us that she's listening in on the entire conversation. She shares her displeasure with Nerdy about his picture circulating the halls of the Apple Store. She thinks he underestimated them in Vienna and this caused them to lose the Hydrosec. I could be wrong here, but I think Sonia Braga's attempting to soften her real accent in order to sound more neutrally European. If that's true, it's working; she sounds less Latina and more…Madonna at one of her stupid children's book readings. Nerdy wants another chance to prove himself. Luckily, Elena knows just how he can do that. Nadia brings her laptop home every night and it has Apple Store access. "How long would it take you to hack into it?"

We don't find out how long, because we have to go check in with Jack and his hallucination du jour. What? Like you don't KNOW how this ends. Oh, okay. If you don't, I won't spoil it. Too much. Suffice it to say, now that I know how this scenario ends, these doctor/patient scenes are a whole lot scarier. You'll see what I mean when you watch it. So, anyway, Jack's rolling down his sleeve, after obviously getting yet another treatment. Dr. St. Hubbins informs him that they're running out of options. His white blood cell counts aren't what he'd hoped they'd be. Jack hopefully says that their options are limited, not exhausted. The doctor just tells him a story about Alexander Fleming and the discovery of penicillin. It's a well-told story, but the only way it relates to Jack and his current condition is how Dr. St. Hubbins accidentally stumbled upon his potential cure for radiation. Jack's overall demeanor during this entire side trip to Disease Central is kind, gentle, and vaguely amused, so that really should be your first clue that something's rotten in the state of Jackmark.

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