Search And Rescue

Episode Report Card
Erin: A | Grade It Now!
The bitch is back.

By the way, we're thirty-three minutes into this second episode and, even though we ALL talked about how AWESOME this ep was because of Lena Olin, so far, she's only been in less than five minutes of it. You can either say that she's so fucking cool that she makes five minutes seem like an eternity, or you can say that we all wanted her back so much that we made a small contribution into a GARGANTUAN one. Take your pick.

Syd leaps down into the pit and tries to talk to her mother. Irina looks like she doesn't trust her own eyes. "S--Syd?" she begins. "You're gonna be okay," says Syd, cutting her mother free of her bindings. "Sydney?" says Irina, her eyes filling with tears. Sydney's crying now too. Irina reaches out and touches her face. "I…knew you'd come," she whispers. Aw. Nadia reaches down and takes her mother's hand, bringing her to the surface. Irina's wrists are bloody and torn. The girls take their mother to the boat. Before they can reach it, however, they accidentally trip a wire and announce their presence to the guards. The girls and Spy Mommy haul ass as the guards run after them. Suddenly, Syd's ankle is caught in a trap and she's whipped up into the trees, hanging upside down. Irina calls for Syd's knife, but Syd can't reach it. Nadia tosses over hers and heads off to delay the guards.

Irina starts to cut Syd down as Nadia handles a couple of guards rather easily. Fighting, fighting, fighting. Irina cuts Syd down and she falls to the ground. While they're just, you know, milling around, Nadia's basically kicking the asses of several large dudes. It's totally awesome. In the space of twenty seconds, Nadia takes out about eight burly men. Heh. She grabs their ammo and runs to meet her chickies. They race to the boat as the guards shoot at them. They reach the raft and Nadia and Irina jump in, firing all the way at the guards. A jeep full of 'em drives up and there's shooting and boat starting and more shooting and all sorts of chaos. Syd flings a grenade and jumps into the boat and they motor off.

The following morning (I…guess?), Jack's leaning against the hood of the jeep, obviously having stood there for, what, eight hours? Damn. Did he even sleep? Guess his stamina's about as good as Katya's, huh? There's a rustling in the woods and Jack pulls his gun, only to see that it's his daughters (oh, Nadia is so totally his) and his not-dead wife. They move hesitatingly toward each other, the emotions on their faces running the gamut from hatred to hey, how ya doin'? "Irina," Jack rasps, his lips pursed. "WHAM!" goes Irina, delivering a very sound roundhouse punch to his jaw. Jack's head snaps back up like a damn Weeble and his expression is like, yeah. I deserved that. The daughters, watching, have the exact same expression. Heh. Well done, Irina. And welcome back.

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