Alias
So It Begins

Episode Report Card
Manimal: D+ | 1 USERS: C
YOU GRADE IT
Been Around The World (tm Lisa Stansfield)

Anyway, more let's-violate-the-first-rule-of-screenwriting-or-any-narrative-writing-period dialogue. Sydney tells Vaughn that if he listens to her, she will hand him the people who, in record time, will bring SD-6 down. Vaughn hands her a pad of paper and tells her to draw him a map of SD-6, their allies, and how far it reaches. Sydney reaches really far into her bag of Snip and yells at him, "Do I look like I'm in junior high?" Vaughn yells at her to do it while Sydney yammers on and on and ON AND ON about how she's doesn't have braces and headgear. Sure wish she had a muzzle, though.

Sydney does it. Vaughn looks like he needs a drink, or possibly a Lithium. Sydney's map fits on a sheet of 8 1/2 by 11 paper. Then she accuses Vaughn of having a problem with her because she's a woman, or of not liking her attitude. No way! Not liking her attitude! The hell you say!

Okay, that's it. It's only been four minutes into this episode and I'm having so many issues with this show, it's turning into a subscription (tm Will from Big Brother 2). And I'm a feminist (albeit the kind of feminist who thinks both women and men should shave their armpits. I know, it's weird, but I think the war with body hair is one that both genders need to engage in; really, it would bring us closer together), but if there's one thing that bugs me, it's random accusations of sexism when there's no real evidence of it, which I think completely, you know, set back The Cause, and it ESPECIALLY bugs me when it's used as a pointless throwaway in this show since we've seen zero evidence of Vaughn being a sexist pig, and in fact he's actually been fairly decent to her thus far. If anything, Vaughn seems very SNAG-y (Sensitive New-Age Guy) to me.

Sydney then brings the Snip even further and tells him that there's only one way they're going to immobilize SD-6, and that's her way, and to forgive her for being forthright or, you know, female, but that's how it's going to be. Vaughn, to his credit, does not point and do a Nelson laugh at her, but he does, gently, lay down the pimp hand and brings out an enormous roll of butcher paper that's the real scope of SD-6; needless to say, it's big. Really, really big. The camera pans over it lovingly. He tells her that since he's been in the CIA, he's only seen that map grow, and that they could've raided the Los Angeles cell years ago, but they want to bring down the whole beast. He tells her that it's complicated, political, and long-term. He tells her to memorize the code. Sydney snips, "I did."

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Alias

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