The Solution

Episode Report Card
Erin: B+ | Grade It Now!
Solution! We Don't Need No Stinkin' Solution!

St. Somewhere Else Hospital. Auntie Em's crashed out in a hospital bed looking much worse than the last time we saw her. Syd enters with a box of candy. Yes, because chemo patients are ALL about eating. Syd takes a seat and it's then that I notice that her makeup is FABULOUS. Her eyes are all lined with black and her lipstick rocks. I guess killing her ex-non-boyfriend really agrees with her. Maybe I should consider that. If I off Wedge, maybe I'll get a killer wardrobe, become a rogue double agent AND get myself a wicked makeover at M.A.C. Hmmm. Note to self: learn jujitsu and pick up weapon of extreme silence and ultimate sharpness. Second note to self: make appointment at nearest M.A.C. counter.

Syd says that she's sorry Auntie Em has to go through this and Auntie Em just asks Syd to tell her something happy. Since nothing happy has happened in Syd's life since 1984 when she attended the Duran Duran concert and managed to catch John Taylor's sweaty towel, it takes her a few minutes to come up with something. She tells Auntie Em that she's got a week off from work, which is nothing considering that Uncle Arvin owes her, like, fifty comp days. Auntie Em, in her current state of extreme drugginess, takes the leap and asks Sydney if she can offer some advice.

Auntie Em tells Sydney to concentrate on friends and family because, years from now, when she looks back, work won't seem that important. "Even your job," she concludes. "Even working for SD-6." D'oh! Auntie Em is completely unaware that her entire room is being watched by some SD-6 lackey at the moment. Auntie Em blathers on about SD-6 and losing perspective, but it doesn't really matter because Auntie Em is one dead mutha right now. Syd wants to know when Uncle Arvin spilled the beans. He didn't. Auntie Em just picked up clues over the years.

As Auntie Em manages to make it clear to Sydney that she doesn't really know precisely what SD-6 is (she's proud of our dear Uncle Arvin, instead of being AFRAID of him), the SD-6 lackey is busy communicating Auntie Em's little security breach to the head office.

Speaking of the head office...Spy Daddy's hanging out in the Conference Room of Endless Expositions. Syd enters, gives Spy Daddy a look, and he quickly shuts the doors and activates his little "room cleaner," which gives them two minutes to talk without being heard. Syd spills the beans about Auntie Em knowing about SD-6. Spy Daddy already knows. "It's too late," he says. "Your conversation was recorded." Syd's all, and? Spy Daddy's all, information about SD-6 must be treated like a virus, so, pretty much, Auntie Em's gonna be given a little anti-viral action. "There is only one response," says Spy Daddy. "Containment."

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