The Two

Episode Report Card
Erin: B- | Grade It Now!
Mr. Sandman, bring me a clue

Oh, please. Like YOU don't do your little Alias dance when the music comes on. Hell, I did my little Alias dance when I got the Season One DVDs. My little Alias dance consists of a few well-moderated frugs around the living room, some kinky hand flips, and a bit of a booty push. But that's just me. You do your own little Alias dance and keep it to yourself.

Oops Center. God, I missed typing that. Heh. Also? I had to wipe my hard drive for the fourth goddamn time last night, and that means that all my special Word dictionary entries were lost. So, "heh" and "Syd" and "Arvin" and "frugs" and "pudwhapper" are all getting tagged with red underlines. God, how many fucking words did I educate Word's dictionary on last season? I mean, come on! "Buttlick" isn't a WORD?

Aaaanyway…Oops Center. Syd and Sean are walking through the main area, with Syd waxing amnesiac about how everything's different and how there are all these faces she doesn't recognize. You and us both, sister. Like, where's Hot Agent Craig? Or, um, WILL? Or, like, SPY MOMMY? Sorry. I might be frothing at the mouth over here. Just then, Marshall scampers up and practically shouts, "Hello! Sydney! I'm Marshall Flinkman! I work here! Tech design and operation --" Before he can reintroduce himself in all his geekiness, Syd launches forward and hugs him heartily, announcing that of course she remembers him.

Marshall sputters and spits and declares that he wrote a poem about Syd, and he starts to read it. "I've lost my keys. Where are they?" BWAH! God, I missed Marshall. I didn't miss his poetry, but I missed him. Thankfully, Marshall's would-be sweat-upon girlfriend comes up, and Syd greets her with a "Carrie!" and a hug. She steps back and realizes that Carrie's pregnant. "Oh, yeah. Yeah. I am," says Carrie, looking none-too-pleased about it. "I, uh, I wonder who the father is," says Marshall, grinning geekily.

And the funniest scene of this episode occurs.

"What, are you guys married too?" Syd says incredulously. "No! Noooo," says Carrie with an expression of "HELL NO!" on her face. "Not yet," says Marshall. "No, we're not married," insists Carrie. "Well, we just haven't set the date yet --" spits Marshall. "We're not even engaged…we're just having a kid!" says Carrie. "Well, we're talking about getting married --" "NOT REALLY," says Carrie, with this absolutely hilarious expression on her face. Syd kind of looks at Marshall. "She just has an issue with wedlock," says a chagrined Marshall. Well, Marshall, I'd have an issue too with anything referred to as WEDLOCK. Sean tries to usher Syd along to Dixon's office, and Carrie tells her to just ask if she needs anything. "I lost my keys," says Marshall, determined to end the encounter on a poetic note. "Where are they?" No one responds. "That's a metaphor," Marshall explains.

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