Alias
Truth Be Told

Episode Report Card
Manimal: B | 2 USERS: A+
YOU GRADE IT
Truth be told -- over and over again

The phone keeps ringing. Sydney leaps out from behind a car, and some ass-whomping begins. Why oh why do directors these days shoot action scenes all close-up and muddy so you can't see anything? Oh, right -- when your actors don't know martial arts, it's easier to cheat that way. Jennifer Garner does look okay as a fighter, and she looks like she could do some hurt, unlike a tiny little Slayer we know, and yes, it's incredibly hard training to put yourself through especially if you're pretty new to it, but it's just so very, very sad watching American actors try to imitate Hong Kong action and fail miserably. Guys, this tip might help: don't move like you're fighting your granddaddy with arthritis in his joints. Jeez.

More fightage. The scene ends rather bizarrely with a gun-toting SD6er against a car and Sydney delivering, v-e-r-r-y slowly, a side kick that shatters the window behind him. Right then a car pulls up. It's Spy Daddy! And Sydney calls him "Daddy"! Is that weird? I mean, I stopped calling my Dad "Daddy" after the age of eight. Spy Daddy tells her to get in the car, and a garage chase scene ensues. Man, I bet Ford loves watching government chase scenes -- there are no other scenes where a producer would CHOOSE to use a Ford.

Spy Daddy's car. Best Friend calls Sydney and asks what's up, and to call her back to hear about her crazy day. Sydney says, "Me, too," numbly and hangs up. More chase-age, some gunshots. Lots of techno. The other car and driver get it, and Spy Daddy pulls away. He tells Sydney to put on her seat belt. Hee! Is that such a parental reflex or what?

Spy Daddy tells Sydney that the agency doesn't trust Sydney anymore, and that they're going to kill her. Jennifer Garner's face here looks like she just got told she didn't make captain of the cheer squad. Spy Daddy tells Sydney that he works for SD6, just like her, and that he's gotten her a safe flight to Switzerland that leaves that night. Sydney gasps, "I thought you sold airplane parts!" Spy Daddy snaps, "I don't sell airplane parts. I never sold airplane parts." Why does he sound bitter that she never noticed? Doesn't that mean he did his job very well? They pull up to a deserted area, and he tells Sydney to get in the car waiting across the lot, since it's only waiting for two minutes. Also, at one point during this scene, Sydney starts pulling on his face to see if it's a rubber mask. I think it was supposed to be funny.

Sydney asks, "Who are you?" Spy Daddy tells her there's no time for her not to trust him, and that she doesn't know who she's dealing with. Cue drum roll -- Spy Daddy reveals that SD6 is not, in fact, a black-ops division of the CIA. He asks Sydney if she knows what the "Alliance of Twelve" is, and she recites that they're a bunch of "freelance" agents (I am so calling myself that instead of "freelance writer") that are the enemy of the United States. He says that SD6 is a branch of that Alliance, not of the CIA. Personally, I think the phrase "Alliance of Twelve" sounds like J.J. Abrams has been smoking crack while playing D&D, but if that's the name they're using, ho-kay. Then, as if the noise of the ringing hammer and anvils weren't enough, Spy Daddy says, "You work. For the very enemy. You are fighting." Umm, when did subtlety only become available on the black market? I'm willing to start up a fund and buy a little for the show. Who's with me?

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Alias

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