Episode Report Card
Sara M: A | 1 USERS: A+
It's Always Been My Least Favorite Day of the Week

Marshall is stopped at Ulrich's door. As instructed by Syd, Marshall says that Ulrich will want to see him, because Alex wasn't the only person who betrayed him. The guard consults with Ulrich over his walkie-talkie, then lets Marshall in. Marshall enters a well-appointed room with pretty wood panels. The guard pats him down, and lets him keeps his cigarette case and cell phone. That guard is so fired. The guard leaves the room, and Marshall thanks Ulrich for seeing him. Ulrich doesn't care for any of this preamble, and tells Marshall not to waste his precious time. Syd tells Marshall that Ulrich is a blowhard. With that, Marshall introduces himself to Ulrich: "Bristow. Jack Bristow." "That's-that's good," says Syd. In full Jack Bristow mode, Marshall continues that if he's wasting Ulrich's time by being polite, he can just leave right now. "Don't go overboard!" Syd warns. "Just don't call me when the Third Faction goes down in flames," says Marshall, really getting into this. "Don't mention Third Faction!" says Syd. Marshall's tough-guy smirk disappears. Syd might have warned Marshall about not mentioning the Third Faction, like, BEFORE he went inside the club.

Marshall takes a seat at Ulrich's desk. Syd reports that the cigarette case/flash drive isn't close enough to Ulrich's computer to get any information. Marshall takes out a cigarette and offers one to Ulrich, who refuses. Marshall slides the cigarette case along the desk, right next to Ulrich's laptop. He lights his cigarette and coughs. Ulrich stares at him. Marshall says he has some "conversations on tape" that mention Ulrich. Syd tells Marshall to keep this going for two minutes so they can get all of the laptop information. Their conversation continues, with Syd feeding Marshall lines like that Letterman sketch, and Marshall spitting them back at Ulrich in his best Jack Bristow voice. Then the operation hits a snag -- Marshall says that the conversations are from Ulrich's third in command, who, it turns out, only speaks German. Ulrich spits some German at Marshall. Syd gives Marshall a German reply, but Marshall has other ideas. In English, he tells Ulrich that it's none of his business how he got the tapes. Also, he says in German, "I know enough [German] to deal with trash like you." I'll bet Marshall never thought that high school German class would ever come in handy in the real world. Good thing he had a better teacher than whoever taught him Spanish in college.

Vaughn reports that Ulrich's computer is protected by a firewall. Why didn't anyone think that that might happen? Shoot, I put a firewall on my computer, and it doesn't have any top-secret, city-destroying files on it. Ulrich tells Marshall to bring him the tapes and they will have a deal. Syd tells Marshall about the firewall. Vaughn tells the Syd that the firewall is in the basement, and it is "biometrically linked" to Ulrich, which means they'll have to get him down there to disable the firewall. Syd reports this to Marshall, and tells him to use his cell phone gun. Marshall tries to stall Ulrich as he fumbles around trying to load his phone. And then he accidentally fires it. Into Ulrich. "I think I just killed Ulrich!" Marshall says. We see Ulrich, looking very dead. On the bright side, they've already got a half-empty coffin and a perfectly good burial plot just waiting for someone to take advantage of them.

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