And we're back on the couch. Again. Some more. Ally says someone is "after [her]," but she doesn't know who. El Shrinkador asks if it could be JennyAlly, "lesbionically." Dude, I would so be out the DOOR if a doctor ever said that to me. After I picked myself off the floor, where I would have collapsed with laughter at the phrase "lesbionically." "Lesbionic" sounds like the Six Million Dollar Woman's life partner. Anyway, who's after Ally? Hmm? Who could it be? The boy? The doc asks for Ally's hand, then goes off: First, it was an older woman that made him a man, he says. Then, he tells Ally that she will meet a "perfect mate," marry him, then try to change him. Thirty years later, she'll look across the table at her changed, idiosyncrasy-free guy, and say, "You're not the man I married!" His point is that "young men are trainable. It's the woman that makes the man." DEK, you are scaring me.
Another day, another aerial shot of Boston. Ally's on the couch, in a Prada top. What, does she buy therapy time like I buy blocks of yoga classes? You know, in bulk, months at a time? She says she thinks his man-fixing theory is wrong, and "not what we should look for in relationships." But that's what we do, he says. Ally is all, nooo, bad, wrong. The doc asks for her hand again, and then says he's going to tell her a secret. She leans in conspiratorially. "If [her] desire for him is sexual, and only sexual, [she] should go to [herself] with him in mind." Hee! I like that. "Go to yourself." It works with all genders! But please, god, spare me an Ally masturbation scene. I wonder if she even knows how. No, I take it back. I don't want to know.
Another aerial shot? But this is the same day. Ally is scootering herself off to work, as the voice-over wonders about being pursued, and maybe "god made another [Ally]." We see JennyAlly scootering fifteen feet behind Ally, juggling anvils and doing more subtle things like having exactly the same hairstyle as Ally. They get off the elevator, and Elaine takes their matching scooters. Fish asks Ally to help work it out between Glenn and JennyAlly. Christ. Ally-Billy, Jenny-Glenn. You know, in the New Reality, now more then ever, we should all treasure subtlety. I am not kidding. Please. This totally obvious "symbolism"? Is not pleasant. Try a little metaphor. It won't hurt. Please. This has been your public service announcement from Mighty Big TV. Thank you. Ally stalks off and bumps into Cage, who calls her "pork chop." I'm sure you saw it on all the promos for this episode. Ally takes umbrage, Cage is horrified. He meant to say "lamb chop." But you knew that.