Ally McBeal
Ally McBeal

Episode Report Card
Alex Richmond: C | 897 USERS: C+
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I Need Drugs

Glenn strides down the corridor, only to be out-strode by the very beautiful and glamorous Jacqueline Bisset, who's wearing slim dark boots, a short skirt, and a beige trench coat. Glenn, she says. Frances, he says. What is she doing here? Looking for Jenny. She adds that Glenn looks fabulous. Frances, you look fabulous. And I loved you in Class! I wonder how many people tell her that. Anyway, Jenny is wearing the indie-rock fall uniform of 1999, which is an oxford shirt under a tight maroon sweater (navy is also acceptable), and seems less than thrilled to see her mom at the office. Yes, Jackie Bisset is supposed to be Jenny's mom. I know. If Jenny still harbors mom issues, one might be that her mom is ten times sexier and far more attractive than herself. But I guess the mom issues will eventually reveal themselves over the remaining seventeen episodes of this stupid season, so I don't need to figure them all out now. Jenny drags her mom into a private area, leaving Glenn, Ray, and Fish to drool over Jenny's hot mom. Fish is particularly intrigued. His boners have boners. Oh, boy.

Jenny's mom has been fired for having a relationship with a younger man; also, she's marrying him. Jenny isn't happy to hear all of this: "Is this what you came to tell me?" Could you show a little more respect for your mother, young lady? Jackie Bisset doesn't say that; that was me. Jackie says she's come to "hire this law firm," though the closed captioning says, "save this law firm," because she's heard Cage & Fish is great with sexual-harassment cases, and that there's a "fabulous little dwarf called 'the croissant.'" Hee! That would be The Biscuit, who Jenny says is "full-size." And "missing." "Missing"?

Ally McBeal

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