Ally McBeal
Ally McBeal

Episode Report Card
Alex Richmond: C | 897 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
I Need Drugs

Then, we're in Ally's office, who says "missing" again, and stammers a bit. Will Ally represent Jackie? Oh, and the trial is tomorrow. Jackie fired her last lawyer and the judge won't accept a continuation again. Why is every fucking trial "tomorrow"? And wouldn't Jenny have a semblance of a clue as to what's going on in her mother's life? Ray knocks on the door to talk about the kiss he and Jenny shared. He wants to date her. Jenny wants to think about it. Ray says sure, adding, "If the answer is no, would you object to me dating your mother?" Jenny retorts that her mother is getting married. Ray shoots back, "Great! That's one obstacle removed." What?

Aerial shot of Boston. Day turns to night. The blues play heavily on a piano. Hey, it's Elton John playing "Wasted Days and Nights." Sort of like the time spent watching this show. Get it? "Wasted Days and Nights"? Ling complains that they've hired another singer, and how do they expect people to keep up? Nelle explains that that's Elton John, who's "trying out new material." "Oh," says Ling. "Could they get him to turn it down?" Hee! Elton continues at full volume, and hey, is Edgar Winter in his band? Or is that some other fair-haired old rocker guy? Anyway. Fish and Ray share a little horny-bastard talk at a table. Fish wants Jenny's mom. Her wattle? Extraordinary. Ray asks what Fish thinks about him and Jenny. Fish says it's hard to tell, because he doesn't care. Dude, me too! Then, that he wants to lure Jenny's mom into the hole. Ray blinks and nods, knowing he's upstaged and outclassed. But hotter.

Elton's song fades into the Boston night sky, and we land in Ally's office, where she expositionally says that she can't believe she's stuck preparing for trial tomorrow when Elton John is in the bar. Glenn says he heard Sting sang there last year. Yup, says Ally: "He sang with my boyfriend." Glenn asks, "Your boyfriend sang with Sting?" Yeah. And Ally sang with Barry Manilow. Glenn, honey, your day will come. Some lovable old dinosaur will have a record that needs promoting and you'll get to pretend to be thrilled to share the stage with him or her. Won't that be a cool rite-of-passage thing for your character? Except not? Yeah. Glenn asks, "What happened to him?" Ally says she thinks a VH1 special. No, Glenn means her boyfriend "him," not Barry Manilow "him." "We broke up. Next!" Glenn is all, "Is there a 'next'?" He shoots her a funny look. Ally doesn't get it. They are never, ever going to do it, are they? Glenn says he had a dream about Ally last night; she, rather rudely, says, "Duh! I was there!" Oh, boy. She stammers to cover, then listens as Glenn tells his dream: they were water-skiing, but Ally was too afraid to "grab the rope." Heh. What could that mean? Ally wonders. Jenny bursts in and says, "It means you want to go skiing, but are too afraid to grab the rope. You guys ready? Where's my mother?" Not here, and they are ready. Ally says the case is "straightforward." Whatever. The elevator dings, and Jenny cringes. Time to meet the new stepdad! They three lawyers march out, and see Jackie holding the arm of a much younger man: Tim. Tim is younger than Jenny. Ally is agog, Glenn gently stunned. Jenny? Manages a conflicted smile. The violins swell, and I guess we have yet another nutty situation. Yawn.

Ally McBeal

Comments

SHARE THE SNARK

X

Get the most of your experience.
Share the Snark!

See content relevant to you based on what your friends are reading and watching.

Share your activity with your friends to Facebook's News Feed, Timeline and Ticker.

Stay in Control: Delete any item from your activity that you choose not to share.

The Latest Activity On TwOP