The jury decides in favor of Jerry Hill. Jerry and Ally trade vaguely barbed words that have no effect on anything, except maybe on Jerry's perception of Fish & Cage's professionalism. All I can say is that, if physical attributes were such an important part of Ms. Pipp's job, Ms. Hill should have said so before hiring her. It should have been in the job description so that women applying for the job could decide whether they wanted to go through the hassle of being sex objects or not. Because it was not in the job description, Ms. Pipp wasted years of her career at Roth PR and now only has a hole in her résumé to show for it.

Can we just get to the freaking twist contest already? Sheesh.

The camera moves jerkily over Boston at night, reminding me of that Madonna video in which I used to think Madonna was singing "And I feel like a disco ball." She actually sings "I feel like I just got home." My version sounds better, doesn't it? That's me, though. I'm wacky with the song lyrics. That's my quirk. I know some of MBTV's sometime readers think that I don't have the right to make fun of the show because I don't always know all the details of the songs played on it. I didn't recognize the words of master lyricist Bob Seger -- who am I to voice an opinion? In response, I'd like to quote the man himself:

I used her and she used me and neither one cared
We were getting our share
Workin' on the night moves

See? I use Ally for this job, and she uses me and the other fat chicks for ridicule and ratings, and neither of us care. I write my recaps at night, hence I'm working on the night moves. No, I didn't recognize the work of Bob last week. I didn't recognize the guy singing with Vonda at the beginning of this episode. That's my quirk -- don't you see? Like John and Ally, I'm quirky. Don't you find me lovable now? Don't you want to give me a trophy?

So we're at the twist contest, and Chubby Checker's singing. Richard thought he was dead. Ling sits next to him wearing a ponytail and big hoop earrings. Nelle wears red, with a big red flower in her hair. Sam Adams tells her that she's ready. He says that the secret is sex. She must make love to the song. Nelle says, "Okay." She's probably disturbed by Sam's blatant Hot Latin Lover typecasting. Elaine meditates and Mark asks her to channel some rhythm his way.