The jury returns from a quick deliberation and does not grant the annulment. Maureen is stricken. Wayne walks up and tells her he doesn't want the alimony he's entitled to. John and the other lawyer blatantly eavesdrop. Wayne says that he did love Maureen and he wanted to be married to her forever but she rejected the terms they decided to live under. She pushed him away. "Because I wanted to be touched. I wanted a little passion, Wayne," says Maureen. "That wasn't the basis of our relationship," says Wayne. "There may have been fraud here, Maureen, but I wasn't the one to commit it." Yeah, you stupid cow. You should have been grateful for what you had. You got to marry a handsome guy. He was nice to you. He made you laugh. He spent your money and only screwed other women when you were out of town. You had all that and you wanted sex, too? Yeah, right, fatso. Dream on! Maybe you'll be so lucky in your next life, if you're a fat man. Until then, like it or lump it. You say you've met fat women who have sex? They were lying to you! It never happens! John offers to walk Maureen home while Vonda croons. Maureen should pay him for the privilege. She's fortunate he's willing to be seen with someone as hideously not-thin as she is.
Vonda continues her Anne Murray song. Brian sulks in his dark office. Larry surveys his own. Ally lies in her bed with a book with a lion on the cover. She does a voice-over about how she was usually loneliest in her life when some guy was right next to her. I guess she'd better hurry up and break off a piece of sweet Larry, then.
Next week on Ally McBeal: Richard and Ling do spit takes on a transvestite who's hooking up with Mark, and the insane redheaded doctor from Melrose Place touches John's ass.