Ally McBeal
Ally McBeal

Episode Report Card
Pamie: D | 555 USERS: C+
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The Oddball Parade

Continuing the most offensive ad campaign ever, The Colonel pretends to be so down with his homies that now he's into basketball. He spins the ball on his finger and at one point pulls his fist down by his hip and shouts "Boo-ya!" Notice how the man never takes off his plantation uniform.

I see Nelle for the first time. It's a L'oreal commercial.

The Clapper explains that he repeats words and claps his hands. He repeats words when he hears other people repeat words. The jurors look nauseous. He says that he was fired because his applauding made people nervous, but it never affected his job. John silently claps his hands.

Ally tells Elaine that she's not going to do the concert. She says she's an attorney and that she should act like one. They bump into Billy on the stairs and he tells Ally that she should do it. Elaine walks off asking Billy to convince Ally. Ally says that it's silly. Billy says that she wants to do it, so she should. He says it's better to regret the things you do than the things you don't do. "What's in there?" he asks, and points to her left breast. "I wanna dance," Ally says. "Then dance," Billy says. First Footloose and now Fame. My beer is ruined. Billy walks away as Ally sniffs his butt. She doesn't, but she does.

"How long are we gonna wait like this?" S&S says as he fixes his make-up. Quiet Witness next to him assures him that he looks very nice. Angry Redhead Lady says that she can't believe they are going to settle before she testifies. People start bickering. The Clapper claps. Richard and John walk in and tell them that the defense is willing to settle for seventy-five apiece. They are outraged. John asks if he can be honest. "No," S&S says, "lie to us, you little bug." John is very offended. Richard says that wasn't necessary. Quiet Witness tells S&S to apologize. He does. Richard says that The Clapper came off as a "wackadoo." John says that seventy-five isn't a bad offer. Quiet Witness says that they had planned on spending their lives there and that seventy-five isn't a good enough offer. He says it's not like they have families or "well-rounded lives." Their jobs were their lives and their families were the people they worked with. This always gets right to the heart of John, so he starts to crumble. He says that if they want to continue the fight then they will. Quiet Witness says they do. John announces, "Onward." As they walk out of the room, S&S apologizes again. He says that ever since they weren't allowed to march in the company's Fourth of July parade, he's been pretty angry. He says that if John really thinks they should settle then he could probably talk the others into going along. John says it isn't necessary. They go back into court.

Ally McBeal

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