Amazon Reunion

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Mother's Day Massacre

When we last left Survivor, Peachy was a gleeful, dimpled subway rider; Rob was the "smartest player to never win"; newly spiky Matthew made it to the final two and only got one vote; and Jenna was revealed as the unpleasant victor. We were live in NYC at the Survivor Amazon reunion show, and Jenna and Matthew -- who had shared the very first celebratory hug -- were now suspiciously sharing the last.

Peachy, attired in his New Yorker costume -- shades of black and gray -- welcomes us back to the Amazon reunion show. He congratulates Jenna on a "well-earned" victory and calls her "very tough" out there. She was "very" lots of things: spoiled, entitled, ungracious, lazy -- the list goes on -- but "tough" is not my word of choice. Peachy points out that Jenna "pulled off" several accomplishments: she was the youngest competitor of all six seasons of Survivor and thus the youngest winner ever; she won four of eight immunity challenges (the only person ever to win more was Australia's Colby), including having "dominated" the last two when she desperately needed them; she was the only player ever "crazy enough" to give up immunity; and she turned down an offer from Rob guaranteeing her a spot in the final two. What's on Peachy's mind -- and the minds of the rest of the viewing audience -- through all this is, "Christy! What the heck is goin' on?" Christy, resembling Jodie Foster, tucks her hair back and grins ambiguously as we see the clip of Christy warbling that, "Those freakin' evil stepsisters of mine are not gonna win the million dollars. Not gonna happen!" Peachy asks what happened to change Christy's mind, and she responds with the standard "outwitted, outlasted, and outplayed" shtick. When Peachy questions whether it's just a "nice answer," or if she really believes that Jenna outplayed both her and Matt, Christy pauses before agreeing, explaining -- if "explaining" is taken in the loosest sense of the word -- that since she'd been with Jenna since the beginning of the game, but only met Matt halfway through, she felt like she'd "give [Jenna] that opportunity to win." Peachy points out that Christy is working with an interpreter and snits, "Too bad you didn't have one out in the game -- might've helped you a little bit!" I'm not sure that came out the way Peachy intended.

Peachy turns back to Jenna, and lays out what he says everyone must be thinking: for the bulk of the thirty-nine days, she "acted like a selfish, spoiled only child." The audience claps and hoots as Jenna agrees that it's a "fair enough" description. Peachy thinks she changed, though, in the last few days: she "got game." He adds, "To me, [you] became a lot more likeable." Jenna responds, "And that's a hard thing to do!" She insists that she's young and has a lot to learn, and that the crumbling of her alliance caused her to wrestle with the decision, "Am I gonna fight, or am I gonna run?" While watching herself throughout the season she thought, "Boy I am spoiled sometimes! And I am...annoying!" She tells us again that she's learned a lot about herself, and claims that it's a hard thing to do with a viewing audience that isn't aware that she's learning. Matthew's and Jenna's arms and legs and hands and feet are completely intertwined as Peachy points out that Jenna "took a lot of heat;" she admits that it was mostly deserved and she's a better person because of it, which is what matters in the end. She rests her head on Matt's shoulder.

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