American High

Episode Report Card
Erin: A+ | Grade It Now!
Can I graduate?

Meanwhile, Morgan's dad is dropping Duncan off at school, and Duncan innocently asks if Morgan's going to graduate that night. Papa Morgan responds that no, Morgan will not be participating in either the graduation ceremony or the party afterwards. Duncan's all, "What NOW?" and rolling his eyes. Dad's all, "Morgan's a fucking idiot." Duncan's all, "No shit, Sherlock." It seems that Morgan and a couple of his buds were the ones responsible for the little art fair displayed on the school pavement. I know. You're thinking, "Dude. It's just some spray paint. Big fucking deal. And they didn't even use swear words!" That's what I was thinking. Unfortunately, they were caught in the act by Highland Park's finest. At, like, two in the morning.

So, Morgan's been suspended through graduation. How dumb is that punishment anyway? It must have been really difficult for the administrators to come up with that one. "Let's more day of school...graduation's FROM GRADUATION. BANNED FROM GRADUATION." "Right, but, I'll still graduate, right?" "What's that?" "I'll still graduate. I'll still receive my diploma." "Oh, yes. Right. Yes, of course." "I just won't be walking across the stage with a bunch of hysterical pre-college maniacs." "Uh...yes." "Great. Fine. Whatever. We done here? Because I desperately need a venti caramel macchiato."

Back at Casa de Morgan, Dad is going off on Morgan about how the rest of his friends are suiting up in their caps and gowns over at Ravinia, and this is the time for Morgan to think about what he's done. Morgan pretty much just stands there looking boldly defiant. As Dad exits the room, he gives his parting shot: "You're fucking up everyone else's life around you, Morgan! STOP IT. You only have a right to fuck your own up." Well put, Papa Morgan.

Down in the kitchen, Pops talks to Moms on the phone and tells her that, deep down inside, Morgan probably realizes that he fucked up, but he's not sure yet if Morgan really cares. Pops fills the Moms in on the situation and then says, "And I'm looking at these two bottles of wine and wondering whether I should drink one before you get home." Hee. That's what I'd do. Hell. I'd drink BOTH of 'em if I thought it would help. Or even if I thought it wouldn't help...

Upstairs, Morgan's cleaning his silver ball-bearing necklace and grudgingly saying he's sorry that people won't be able to see him graduate and all, and he's sorry that he did something stupid. Back down in the kitchen, the Pops is talking to the camera crew about how depressed the Moms is about the situation and how he doesn't really think Morgan is remorseful about his actions. Shocker. He's eighteen. Do YOU remember being remorseful about ANYTHING at eighteen? Hell, no. You're invincible. You can do any damn thing you want. Pops is lucky Morgan's even learned how to say the word "sorry." Seriously.

Then Pablo's blah-blahing about how his little sister is going to graduate that day too and he's going to see her be a big girl and then she's going to see him be a big boy. And maybe his mother will even let him wear the long pants and drive the car once around the driveway real slow! Shut up, Pablo. I just started liking you. Don't ruin it.

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American High




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