American High
Homeward Bound

Episode Report Card
Erin: A+ | Grade It Now!
Home is where the heart attack is

Morgan Mansion. Morgan trudges up the stairs and pays a visit to his dying cat, Earl, who is lying on a bed in the dark. Morgan has a really sweet conversation with the cat wherein he asks about the cat's day and asks him how he's feeling. Morgan just gets better and better with every viewing. No, I'm not being facetious. And get me my coffee.

Over at Allie's place, she's telling us that the divorce was really hard on her mother and that she told her mother about her father's impending wedding. Her mother, understandably perhaps, freaked out. As Allie's mother glares at her in the living room, Allie tells us that she finds herself at a loss. "I wanna sit there and say, 'You know what? You're right. He fucked up. It's his fault and screw him.'" In her own interview, Allie's mother tearfully says, "Family is very important to me. You try to give your kids everything and, when you take that away, that's it for the rest of their life and you can't do anything about it." "She doesn't deserve this," says Allie. "This is not her fault. And, um, it's not mine either. She's hurting. I'm hurting. Our relationship has been strained. And there's nothing that I can do." Word.

Morgan's Den of Iniquity. Our hero is playing with his happy hutch of hamsters. Morgan originally just got a male hamster. Morgan must not have checked the jewels out on this rodent, because the day after he got it, it energetically gave birth to a litter of mini-rodents. While his parents were none too pleased about the acquisition of a single hamster, they were over-the-top pissed when it gave birth. I don't know why. A male hamster giving birth? That's a goddamn miracle as far as I'm concerned. Send this one to National Enquirer, Morgan. They pay highly for this sort of crap.

Morgan then pulls out a little hamster that he calls "Stumpy" because it's only got three legs. He loves Stumpy the best, it would seem. It's really cute how much Morgan loves this thing. Really cute.

Somewhere in the heart of Highland Park. Allie's apparently decided to attend Father Fickle's sham of a wedding. In a VO, Allie says that if she went to her father's wedding, her mother would be angry, but if she didn't go, her father would be angry. In an interview, her mother says, "It's real hard for me that Allie has a relationship with...THEM. It's like condoning everything that he did." Yeah, I'm pretty sure that that's how I'd feel too. It may not be right, but that's how I'd feel if I were her. Allie says that she can't cut her father out of life. She told her mother that it's okay if she doesn't accept it, but she can't make Allie feel guilty for it. I actually agree with Allie on this one. Like I said, it may not be right to feel like Allie's deserting her or condoning her father's actions, but it's also not right to make your child feel guilty for wanting to be with her father. Regardless of whether or not he's a cheating buttlick.

Kaytee's then telling us in a voice-over that she doesn't believe in the institution of marriage. Why should she? Nolte and the Mother of Anti-Destiny haven't set a very good example, now, have they? "It just seems like marriage is doomed to fail," she says. "You get bored with each other after awhile. Or you decide you don't really like each other after you grow apart. I really don't think there's a point." Totally. I am SO there with you, Kaytee. This is really not the time or the place for me to describe my feelings and attitudes toward marriage but, you know, yeah, marriage sucks, and yeah, I really don't see the point. And that sort of thing. Right?

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American High




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