American Horror Story
I Am Anne Frank, Part 1

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Joe R: A- | 3 USERS: A+
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I Am Anne Frank, Part 1

After the break, it's like the show knew exactly when I'd start wondering where Devil Eunice has been all day. Here she is, gleefully choosing a cane for Sister Jude to use to discipline Kit and Grace for their transgression. "I don't know what's gotten into you lately," Sister Jude says, "but it's a decided improvement." AGREED, LADY. She then turns her attention to Kit and Grace, who she says are "drawn to each other like the serpent and the apple." She then asks them if they're trying to make a murder baby. Just like that. "Are you trying to make a murder baby?" Like maybe a murder baby is a thing that exists? I'm not even sure what would qualify as a murder baby. Genghis Khan's children? The Bush twins? (Kidding!) (But Laura Bush did kill a guy.) Do they have special powers? I'm genuinely curious now. Grace just wants to get to the part where they get caned already, so they can go about their day. But Sister Jude thinks this has gone beyond caning. Instead, she recommends sterilization. Fun! Just then, Frank comes in with word that two detectives are presently questioning Dr. Arden, so obviously Sister Jude hightails it out of there. She tells Eunice to set the two up in solitary until the paperwork for the sterilization procedure goes through. Eunice has Frank take Grace so she can hang back with Kit and cause some trouble. She pulls out Grace's file and sets it down for Kit to peruse, warning him that Grace is not the innocent girl she claims to be.

Meantime, Sister Jude busts into Dr. Arden's office, where indeed he is being questioned by two plainclothes detectives. Delightfully, she plays it as if she had no idea she would be interrupting anything. She introduces herself to Detectives Byers and Conners and wants to know what they're asking "one of my most valued staff members" about. The cops mutter to each other that a nun would make a pretty good character witness for the guy. She assures them that she has "lots to say," which draws another eye-roll from Arden. The cops tell her that he's accused of roughing up a "lady of the evening," which draws the BIGGEST SMILE EVER from Sister Jude. "A prostitute?!?!" she nearly yelps. Arden sneers that she shouldn't go looking for her fainting couch, as these are egregious lies. We see flashbacks to the Night of the Nun-Hooker which obviously give lie to that. The cops say that the woman claims to have seen disturbing photos and -- this is new -- "Nazi memorabilia." You better believe Sister Jude pulls a double take at that. Arden insists he was at Briarcliff that night, before storming out all, "I never! Good day!" Still breathless from the Nazi part, Sister Jude asks if the cops aren't going to arrest him, if only for vice reasons. They're not Vice, though; they're Homicide. See, there were certain similarities to the hooker's story that made them want to dig deeper. No mention is made of Bloody Face, but the cops do follow up by asking Sister Jude about Kit Walker. In her observation, does he have the "surgical skill" to remove a woman's skin or head? We don't see what Sister Jude says to this, but the violin scratch on the soundtrack registers a definite opinion.

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American Horror Story

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