American Horror Story
The Origins of Monstrosity

Episode Report Card
Joe R: A | 1 USERS: A+
Devil in a Red Dress

Next thing we know, the two men are loading this woman's sheet-covered body into a container bound for the incinerator (this would be the tunnel that, years later, Kit and Grace and Lana would try to escape from). Arden speaks ruefully of the thousands of patients who died within these walls, cremated and long since forgotten. He refers to them as "wasted opportunities" and makes sure to pointedly drop mention of his "research" to Howard. Research that will now end with the purchase of Briarcliff. Howard is intrigued enough, so Arden goes on: he's working on an "immune booster," a bacterial cocktail or sorts that would actually make people impervious to most disease. The next step in his research, of course, is human trials. Howard imagines it would be tough to find volunteers, but Arden tells him that there are certain people whose lives "otherwise serve no purpose." By contributing to his studies, these people would be contributing to the greater good. "A good that would not go unnoticed," he says, "even by Rome." Ah, the magic word for Timothy Howard.

On that very word, we are thrust back into present day, where the good Monsignor has just finished choking what life was left in the Shelley Thing out of her. With his rosary, of course. Much like last week's lobotomy, I'm surprised it's taken us this long to get to Death By Rosary. Howard is, of course, very sad that he had to do that.

With that same rosary in his hand, Howard storms into Dr. Arden's office and points a dramatic accusatory finger in the old man's direction. He says Sister Jude was right in calling him a monster. "Why do you look for the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye while ignoring the plank in your own?" Arden asks, confirming once and for all that he's a huge Godspell nerd. Howard tells him he saw what he did to Shelly. It's at this point that my blood runs cold and a realization washes over me: Joseph Feinnes is trying to do an American accent. He has been all along! Oh God, I can't even look at him! He says "Shelley" like a man without teeth! Anyway, Arden defends himself by basically saying that Briarcliff is a receptacle for human waste and evolutionary failures, so he is making their dumb lives count for something.

We see a bit of a flashback to mere days ago when Arden catches pervo Spivey spying on Devil Eunice through a hole in the wall. He claims that while he feels that he has conquered his indecent-exposure problem, Sister Mary Eunice requested that he "come watch her flash her pussy," which earns him a blow from Arden's cane and, presumably, so much worse.

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American Horror Story




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