American Horror Story
Unholy Night

Episode Report Card
Joe R: A- | 4 USERS: A+
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Mad Santa

Leigh continues to menace Sister Jude, with her begging him to realize that she's not the enemy. He throws her at the wall, and she bangs into the cane cabinet, opening it. Leigh is struck by memories of his abuse at the hands of Sister Jude and her cane. "My welts never healed," he tells her, what with never being allowed out for sunlight, medicine, or even simple bathing. He was in that hole for a solid year, and the wounds putrefied, seeping pus now. (Sorry for that description, but if I have to have it in my head, so do you.) He bends Jude over her desk and begins whipping her, reminding her that she once told him that she was "softening him up" to that God wouldn't have to work so hard to enter him with his light. Okay, gross, Jude. Leigh declares that there is no God. But there is a Santa Claus. And he's dishing out retribution, it looks like.

Meanwhile, Lana begs Kit to let her kill Thredson, but he stops her. They need him. He's the only thing standing between Kit and the electric chair. Solid point. Lana, however, has another lingering question: why is there still a manhunt for Kit? Why hasn't Briarcliff turned him in to the authorities? Um, because the show already worked so hard to get him back here once?

Elsewhere, Dr. Arden pushes Grace's body down the tunnel toward the incinerator. Suddenly, there's that telltale buzzing, followed by the telltale blinding light, followed by the telltale flashes of creepy long limbs. It's abducting time! Unfortunately, it's not Dr. Arden who's taken up to the ship to be in the receiving end of experimental procedures for once; no, it's merely Grace, who has disappeared once all the buzzing and lights are gone. Guess whatever purpose they had for her doesn't end with her human death. Be seeing you soon wrapped in plastic, hon!

Back to Leigh, who is all sorts of ready to rape Sister Jude because rape is an unfortunate theme this season. He descends upon her, but we see moments ago that she grabbed that letter opener when he bent her over the desk. Now, she plunges that letter opener into Leigh's neck and stops the assault. He rolls to the floor, bleeding out, while she looks wild-eyed and lucky to have survived.

Finally, Lana and Kit drag Thredson into a junk room and camouflage him with mattresses because that's the kind of tactical brilliance we're dealing with here. Kit assures Lana that no one ever checks this room, and Thredson is bound and gagged, so I guess everything's fine? Everything's fine! Kit takes off to return to his bed so no one will get suspicious, while Lana crouches down to inform Thredson: "One day, I'll bury you."

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American Horror Story

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