Then Tammy's journey ends and she thanks them for the opportunity, and then, of course, she freaks out about how it's okay and God's will and whatever. She comes off super-cool, actually. Class. She says she'll be voting for Jessica, who's now crying, and Tammy's like, "I don't have any more tears, so don't cry, please." Nice and sweet and a little sad. Also believable. She's been on a non-stop crying jag for weeks. Maybe her whole life. No tears left, you say.
Osborne Smith is now "Nikko" Smith, which apparently is the name of a monkey from The Wizard of Oz or something, which is cool I guess because Nikko's dad is, of course, the baseball player Ozzie Smith, who's called the Wizard of Oz, and whatever. They ask him, "apropos of nothing," whether he still has his lucky coin. Bet he does. Yeah, he does. They tell him to thank it, and then congratulate him. The signal to noise here is such that I might -- in the heat of finding out something like this -- be a little confused as to what in fact my fate might be, but he's smarter than me, old Nikko. He gets it, and lets it go, and he's happy. It's nice.
Aloha Mischeaux. Who? I know, right? Simon tells her the decision was not unanimous, and lets it stretch out into infinity before telling her she's through to the Top 24. I'm so totally excited because I've totally never seen her before in my life and couldn't care less. She totally collapses and I still don't care. Ryan giggles because he can hear her screaming in the elevator. She and her mom freak out and she wants a donut, and it's pretty adorable but I still don't really care.
So Mikalah is so fucking freaked out that she's acting like a person, and even her mom from deep within herself has pulled it together for me and is being pretty sweet about how Mikalah's really talented (true, in a brassy Divine Miss Mikalah kind of way) and she is a good girl (I don't believe it for a second). The judges are all pleasantly surprised because she's acting like a human girl instead of an unholy amalgam of Jerry Lewis and Ethel Merman. Paula is like, "How are you feeling, honey?" in this tone where it's like she's worried because Mikalah's not acting like herself. As though that's a bad thing. She's pensive and really likeable -- I know, I know -- as she just pretty much bares it: "You know, I can't even it's been rough today. So I've seen a lot of really talented people go home." It's all so real. The judges talk crazy about how they've had to send people home and then Simon has to be the cliché that he is, so he's like, "I don't mind." Mikalah looks at him like he's repugnant. "Oh, Simon!" Randy agrees that he's being pointless and classless.