Before we get to the cutting, we get to the padding. But it's special padding tonight. We've got Justin and Kelly (Eeeeeee!) on a big monitor, talking about the haphazard, slapdash film they're being rushed through while people still remember who they are. Yay! Kelly (Eeeeeee!) has her hair pulled back in such a way that couldn't be any more unflattering to her if she had used dead rats as barrettes. She tells us that they're filming the movie right now. They probably are filming right now, given the movie's likely budget, and this actual exchange is going to be worked into a scene somehow. They offer up a preview of a "love duet" for the movie. Before they show that, Ryan asks them if they have any advice for the contestants. Kelly (Eeeeeee!) tells them to run for their lives. She's only allowed to sleep two hours a day, and they sneak laxatives into all her meals to keep her thin. Just kidding. I hope. She tells them all to have fun. Ryan asks them if they're sick of each other. Justin responds by asking Ryan if he's still wearing girly shirts. Not today, but yes.
On to the music video. Apparently, this movie is about two zombies (played by Kelly (Eeeeeee!) and Justin), who fall in "love" in Miami and sing soulless, empty ballads in each other's general direction. Justin pilots some boat just off the coast as Kelly sits there, and the two of them sing lifelessly, squinting off in the distance in the hopes of coming across a brand new land where they're allowed to perform songs that don't suck. They don't even look at each other. I find it amusing, given that Simon whined last night that he had technically good performers singing without personality, that we have the two personable winners of last year's contest acting like they've had their souls sucked right out of their bodies. Oh, and the song is cheesy and stupid. It sounds like a duet that Christina and Ricky rejected in favor of that other cheesy and stupid one they actually did. And it goes on for hours, it feels like. I'm dreading that movie. But I'm totally going to see it.
Back at the stage, Ryan blathers on about a [product-placed wireless service] text message poll to tell us which judge you agree with most often. Ruth Bader Ginsburg. Oh, she's not in this poll. It's just the ones on this show.