The editors have put together a sepia-toned bit called The Miserables, which is a montage of terrible singers and angry departures. Timely!
Ashley Curry is an actual musical theater student, and we know how much Randy likes what he calls the Broadway singers. Fortunately, she's not singing a showtune, but "Mama Knows Best" by Jessie J. Unfortunately, she is terrible. And not just in the "Broadway does not work for American Idol" sense, but in the "also far too terrible for Broadway" sense. The judges are a bit flummoxed, so she offers to do it again in the right key. Which sounds exactly like the first time. Nicki and Keith act as if they're being blown back like in the Memorex commercial, while Mariah gets up from the table and paws at the glass walls in search of an exit. Randy tells Ashley that as a musical theater student, somebody should have told her before now that singing is not her thing. Mariah unwisely tries to humor her by offering to improvise some kind of scene with her and Nicki, so Ashley sings the song AGAIN. In the corridor, Ryan's talking to Ashley's mother and sister when Ashley comes out with the news. In her post-audition interview, Ashley says she doesn't get it, but her mother insists that Ashley has a golden ticket in her heart. I recommend immediate surgery. Dig around in there until it turns up.
At 8:00 PM, Chicago is winding down, which Randy comments on. You know those people who narrate everything and never say anything interesting? Randy's their patron saint. Outside the audition room, Ryan sits on a couch next to a handsome young dude in a teal shirt and purple bowtie. In front of the judges, this fellow introduces himself as Lazaro from Cuba by way of Florida, which takes a while because he's living with a serious stutter. His parents tell us in subtitled Spanish that he started stuttering at age six and nothing seemed to improve it. Indeed, moving to the U.S. shut him down almost entirely. His dad tells us how he doesn't have many friends, so music is his life. He tells the judges that he's going to sing "Bridge Over Trouble Water," and Mariah makes the rookie mistake of completing the thought for him. When Lazaro breaks into song, of course he turns out to have a flawless voice and performance style. "Just sing all the time," Keith tells him, also unhelpfully. It's a whole panel of Lionel Logues here. Randy marvels about how the stammer vanishes when he sings, as though that's not quite common. Lazaro is in tears as they pile on the positive feedback, and Randy counts off yet another simultaneous, unanimous yes. Lazaro is going to Hollywood. Somehow, Randy refrains from blaring into his incredulous face, "Did we stutter?"