American Idol
American Idol

Episode Report Card
Joe R: C- | 572 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
Tuck Nipped

Back from one last commercial break, Ryan immediately sends Ace back to Suffragette City. Ace does that stupid bow to the crowd that I hate so much before giving Lisa a one-armed hug (because she's leaving) and Kat a pat on the shoulder (because she's the one staying). Ryan appeals to the judges for their opinions, which in this case means their opinions of Katharine, because Lisa is but a speck in our rearview mirror at this point. Simon said he watched the show back again last night and he completely reverses his opinion on Kat's performance. Not even close to as good as Christina. He does go on to say that any of the final ten could have been in the bottom three and he wouldn't have been surprised. Ryan sticks up for his best girl, asking Simon if, after weeks and weeks of effusive praise, one bad week makes her deserving of bottom two. I get what he's saying, but "deserves" has nothing to do with it, and even if it does, is it Simon's fault that she's there? He actually over-praised her last night. Simon's response, that the "public knows best," sounds wrong (the public is, in fact, dumb as shit), but is actually correct (dumb or not, guess whose votes matter?). When the only real criteria is "Whatever you like best," it's kind of hard to say the voters were wrong. Ryan asks Paula for her thoughts on "Lisa and Katharine, especially Katharine." Ouch, dude. ["I know! That was the best part of the entire week." -- Jacob] As it was last week, Paula's advice to the contestants is actually her advice to America: "Keep that finger dialin'." Randy is also treading well-worn ground, as he repeats his "You gotta bring it every week" stump speech. He also manages to complete this week's plot arc with a final plea to "pick better songs." Maybe next week will see the dramatic return of "pitchy"?Lisa is Zen about it by now. "Whatever happens happens." Katharine doesn't have much of an answer prepared, and you can see her mind racing to formulate a response that won't sound dumb but is not in fact "I'm too good to be here this early. What the fuck?" Perhaps she looked over to the Suffragettes and the first person she saw was Mandisa, because she's like, "Um…God?" Her actual words are, "You know, like, whatever, you know, God's plan for me, that's all I have in my mind." As panic responses go, I've heard worse. Simon is hilariously staring down at the table and covering his face, perhaps too embarrassed by Kat taking a stab at the Jesus market to even look her in the face anymore. Remember in Contact how Jodie Foster couldn't go into the alien carnival ride machine because she was an atheist and all of a sudden her rival Tom Skerritt was asked what he thought of meeting the aliens and his response was, "Um…God?" I hate that Katharine has become the Tom Skerritt in Contact of this show, even a little bit. Clearly, so does Simon. ["Especially considering he thinks of himself as the Tom Skerritt in Poison Ivy the rest of the time." -- Jacob]

American Idol

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