Randy, due to the "pitchy" factor, decides that Stephanie is better on the up-tempo songs rather than the ballads. Paula says, "Great news first, because that's the way it is." As always. And as always, that "great news" is how pretty Stephanie looks in her tube dress and go-go boots. Hey, it's Paula, it makes sense. She would like Stephanie to go back to "having fun" because her spirit's kind of drifting away at this point. And I think I agree, if only because I can't remember when Stephanie had any kind of spirit, and I know she must have, because I used to really like her. Simon asks Stephanie how she thought she did. "I thought I did...well?" It's a loaded question, of course, because Simon's just lying in wait in case you start feeling your oats. He calls the performance "nightclubby" and "cabaret" and feels Steph's losing her "edge" and her "soul." The edge is one thing, but doesn't losing her soul make her eligible to host and/or judge this show? Simon misses the passion and rawness that apparently Stephanie used to bring, back when we all used to care. She takes this all like a total pro, of course, which is cruelly ironic considering she's totally mature and composed at 19, and yet that beyond-her-years quality is what the judges see as boring. Pity.

When we return, Ryan sells even more of his threadbare soul by hawking cell phones in front of God and everyone. Actually, I say "sells his soul," but honestly if anyone in the world would have written an elementary school essay about wanting to grow up and sell expensive things to bourgeois idiots on TV while dressed in a sharp suit, I believe it would have been Ryan Seacrest. He tosses the phone to someone offstage and nances about unconvincingly like he broke it, and Ryan? This is why you'll never make it as an actor. On to Blake!

Before we even get to the video package, Blake is already beatboxing for Noone, who is so perplexed and frightened of everything Blake represents that he cannot even articulate it. Take all the hatred he had for Chris but then mix it with the abject fear of not even being able to look down on the kid, because everybody's agreed that he's phenomenal. Noone calls all of Blake's machinations "business," as in, "don't let the business get in the way of the actual song." The song is "Time Of The Season," by the Zombies, which is a cool song and very Blake. Noone concedes that the young people will vote for Blake -- why, he doesn't say, but we're left to assume it'll be out of freak-out-the-old-folks solidarity. The actual performance is more of what made last week cool: an intelligent and musically curious guy doing some fun things with an old song, yet keeping it recognizable. I liked it better last week, I have to say. This week seems more affected, though that may be a byproduct of the particularly British phrasing of the original and how it's an odd fit for Blake. But then again, he's the Brandon Flowers of this show, and everybody thinks he's British, so who knows? He gets very into it with the eyes, especially on the "what's your name/who's your daddy?" part. The more I listen to this performance, the less I like it. The production is great, but vocally, he's annoying. I know I'm gonna lose my license for that, but it's true.