America's Next Top Model

Episode Report Card
Potes: A- | 1458 USERS: B-
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Easy, McKeyzy, Beautiful

The girls return, and Tyra looks like she's about to beam everyone back to the home planet. Seriously, what is she wearing? Analeigh looks super sad, Sam looks tense, and McKey looks entirely clueless. And we all know that cluelessness makes for good models. This is why McKey is called first. She seems mildly excited and/or majorly medicated. This leaves Analeigh and Sam in the bottom two. A lot of the judges, including Tyra, think that Analeigh has some of the strongest poses, but her weakness is her soft, sweet, cookie-dough like commercial face. Cookie dough and fashion don't mix, as any skinny bitch will tell you. The judges think it's a shame, because her body is so fantastic. Yeah, Analeigh should maybe put a bag over her head and then try signing with an agency. And then there's Samantha. She looks very commercial when she stands in front of the judges. Then they saw her picture this week, which is very confusing. If she looks commercial in front of them, she should be able to sell commercial in a cosmetics ad. That makes the judges doubt her, because clearly they have NO IDEA who she is. Truly, it is a mystery for the ages. But in the end, Samantha gets to stay. I have to say I was pretty surprised about that. I thought Analeigh might take it all despite her squishy nose. Tyra tells Sam that she has to master how she looks in person to book go-sees, and master her smile, to make money.

Tyra gives Analeigh a quick hug and asks if she's proud of herself. Analeigh is. Tyra thinks Analeigh should be proud of herself, except for the part where she sucked during her commercial. Thanks, Mama Ty. Tyra tells Analeigh that Paulina thinks she's a star actress who can get a lot of modeling campaigns, and the panel thinks that's the direction she should go. Tyra totally just told Analeigh not to be a model! Harsh. Analeigh tells us that she's very upset, but is coming out of this experience a lot stronger and wiser. She has no regrets, as regrets are mistakes you don't learn from. Dance like no one's watching, Analeigh! She says she did her best and gave her heart, and that's all she can give. Too bad she chose "heart" over "good face." Analeigh fades from the group photo and we have our final two!

America's Next Top Model

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