America's Next Top Model
Anthony Zuiker

Episode Report Card
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Express Yourself

Nigel thinks that Bianca's photo is boring, and doesn't work in terms of eyes or body language. ALT says that at the same time it works, because it's like the girl in the schoolyard who's seducing everyone by thinking about how hot she is in her own head. Tyra, however, finds it amateur. Angelea is amazing, and reminds Anthony why he watches this show. Wait, he watches this show? He says that it's not just about beauty, but about character, and Angelea has the strongest character of all the girls. I think he means "is" the strongest character. Shannon's photo is cute, but Nigel doesn't love it. He says that it has a corporate element. ALT says that Shannon knows what she's doing, and he likes it even though it's commercial. Tyra agrees that Shannon knows what she's doing, but wishes that she'd push a little harder in terms of charisma. Tyra calls Nigel a hater when he's unenthusiastic about Bre's shot. Still, he doesn't think it's convincing. Anthony says that Bre was amazing in the challenge, but he'd like to see a full face in her photo. With that, the judges have reached a decision.

Eleven beautiful ladies stand before Tyra, but she only has ten photos in her hands. And those photos represent the girls that are still in the running towards becoming America's Next Top Model. The first name that Tyra's going to call is...Angelea! She gives a spirited, "Hallelujah!" She went from the bottom two to the top, and intends to stay there. Runner-up for best photo is Dominique. Tyra then calls Allison, Laura, Kayla, Shannon, Bre, Bianca and Alexandria. This leaves Camille and Lisa in the bottom two. Tyra claims that the two are polar opposites. Lisa is a daring, possibly out-of-control girl. And Camille is an in-control girl. And yet, they have one thing in common this week: excuses. Camille claimed that she was falling in her shot, while Lisa allowed her identical Cathy Duke-esque cousin, the Excuse Monster, to take her place in the challenge and photo shoot. I wonder if cousin Excuse Monster is related to Cousin Itt. Lisa certainly comes from a diverse gene pool! Tyra does make one sentient comment, which is that this is Cycle 17, and these bitches should know that excuses don't fly. Lisa gets a photo, and Camille has to go back to her shack devoid of utilities.

Tyra hugs Camille, who thanks her for the opportunity and says that she will do better in taking advantage of it. Camille is disappointed that she won't get to experience more of Top Model, but clich├ęs that if at first you don't succeed, try try again. And again, and again, I suppose. She says again that this was an amazing opportunity, and she has to reinvent herself. Not winning America's Top Model isn't the end of everything, and she knows this because she's already done it once before. She just looks SO sad, though. It's really bumming me out. Maybe she can get a consolation prize of a year's supply of Wellbutrin?

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America's Next Top Model




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