Brenda tells us that her fiancé loves long, gorgeous hair. Which she had. Past tense. Brenda is going to trust that Tyra knows what she's doing, which is always a dangerous thing. Tyra tells us that Brenda's current hair is too sexy, so she's going to get a Halle Berry do. Brenda is our first cryer. She says her whole world has been shaken. Angelea smirks as she gazes upon a tearful Brenda, and wonders if she's strong enough to handle the competition. She really should just be glad that she still has hair on the sides of her head. Commercials.

And hey! My Life as a Cover Girl seems to have been replaced with something called Top Model Lounge! It features Stank Bianca II and last season's Laura! Yay! They're going to dish about what just happened. Bianca says it's easy to chastise someone else for crying when you're getting a weave sewn into your head. Laura adds, "Your hair's your sexy blanket." !!!!! I think my hair is more of a sexy afghan. These two sympathize with Brenda. We can see more from Bianca and Laura at cwtv.com/covergirl. Sexy blanket!

When we return, Brenda tells us that she thought her hair was her best asset, so to have it taken away was very painful. She has to learn how to do her hair all over again. The hair looks a bit like vintage early-'80s Annie Lennox, which could be a good thing if Brenda isn't a limp noodle the whole time. Naduah is, of course, already bald. So she's going to have her brows bleached by expert brow lady Anastasia. Naduah looks more like a former cult member than ever! She gives us more cult info: from birth you're told how to "think as a person." Thinking as a person doesn't sound like such a bad thing. Unless it's a molesty person, in which case: bad. Being on this show is a dream come true for Naduah. When she's super excited she gets really weird, but I still love her. I hope she has a therapist.

Angelea is getting a big-ass weave made of Tyra's old hair, right down to the bangs. Angelea describes herself as "fantasticals," showing that pronouncing Givenchy isn't the only thing she's picked up from Tyra and the Jays. She also says that she's fierce, fine, fabulous, and ready to kick ass in the competition. She knows that bitches are going to be hating on her, and actually seems to be looking forward to it. Raina is getting chocolate brown hair, which makes her look exactly like Peter Gallagher in a wig. Tyra leaves the brows as is, obviously. Then there's Alasia, who pledges to Jay that she'll be ferocious. She's getting some body and curl and clip-ins. She loves her girly curlies, and feels bouncy and sophisticated. Anslee is another weepy one who's getting a shorter cut. She's sad to say goodbye to her hair, but in the end says that her new cut is more high fashion. It does suit her, I think.