America's Next Top Model

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Dive Bomb
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!

Previously: The top six were banned from the disgusting Top Model house and swept away to the inter national destination of Hawaii. But it was no vacation for five of the girls who still had to deal with Erin the whole time. And despite being pretty great all season, Brittany was sent home after, the show does not remind us, posing in effing blackface. In any case, five bitches remain!

It is night, and the girls are heading home after panel. Jennifer can't believe that she's part of the final five. Me either! She says it's unreal and scary. Meanwhile, this is the second week in a row that Erin felt certain she was going home. Me too! She says that panel wants her to succeed, and so she doesn't want to let them down. I don't know that they actually give a rat, but okay. Erin says that it's a lot of pressure. She's 18 and this is the biggest thing she's ever done with her life. Sundai tells us that she doesn't even know why Erin's still here. All of the others think that she's hanging by a thread, but manages to hang on every time. The others want to flick her out of the competition like a poodle-haired bug. It would be pretty great if annoying people could be flicked out of existence. Alas, that technology has not yet been invented.

Once the girls get back to their house, Nicole says that she can't even enjoy having the best photo of the week since Brittany went home. She notes that Brittany did really well throughout the competition and had several number one photos. I love that in season 13 these girls are still trying to find the logic in the decisions of the panel. Save the brainpower, sweeties -- there is none. Jennifer takes Brittany's ouster as a reminder that any one picture can make or break you. Unless you're Erin, in which your elf troll powers hypnotize Tyra into handing you a photo. Jennifer interviews that Nicole is a huge competitor and has yet to fall below the halfway line, then animatedly stabs her own hand and yells that she hates the bitch. I love how Jennifer's awesome personality has made me forget about her lazy eye.

Tyra Mail! "You never know what can come to shore. I hope you look appropriate. Love, Tyra." Someone screams that they're going to be sea turtles. Jennifer seconds the animal idea, then cracks up like a maniac. Nicole, true to form, thinks that they might be corpses washed up on the shore. Actually, that sounds totally plausible. The girls hang out in their bedroom, and Nicole tells Sundai that she likes her because she's been through a lot, and yet it hasn't hardened her. Sundai notes that the others don't actually even know her story. Laura remembers that Sundai was adopted, and Sundai quietly says that that was part of it. In an interview, Sundai says that she had a rough childhood and ended up in a foster home. And then, unfortunately, she says, "It actually made me a better person than I am today." And I know what she means, but still. She says that it's better coming from a rough background, because you appreciate things more. Take that, bratface Erin. Sundai says that if she makes it to the final four the others will get the full story. Thank goodness Sundai spilled her background to Tyra and the Jays in the premiere episode, otherwise the other models might never have known. Sundai tells us that if this were to end tomorrow, she'd feel like her life has ended. She says that modeling is her only hope to be successful, and there's nothing else for her. Well, that's pretty devastating. And untrue! I'm sure there's a community theater production of Annie out there that has just been waiting for an 18 year old who looks 12! The Sundai will come out tomorrow!

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America's Next Top Model

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