Celia is a bouncing blonde, according to Tyra, who suddenly has a vaguely British accent like someone who is impersonating Madonna really badly. Tyra uses this accent always when she is "in character." She probably busted it out when she was in her fat suit for The Tyra Banks Show, which really compromised the integrity of that data collection. People weren't being mean to her because she looked fat, they were being mean to her because she's an idiot. Anyway, Celia has beautiful hair, but it gets in the way of her gorgeous cheekbones. So it's getting cut off! Celia gets a bit emotional about it, and Jay says that her hair was long and dry as Ghandi's sandals. Natalie sees Celia crying and hopes she won't have the same fate. However, in the end, Celia feels liberated without all the hair and thinks it will translate in photo shoots. I think it looks good, but still doesn't fix the problem of Celia's face.
Meanwhile, Jay tells Miss J. that if he is dry on his elbows or the husks of his feet (husks?) that he should just go dig his hands up in Aminat's weave. Amina's weave-fro is getting snipped out, which makes me sad. Tyra thinks it's limiting, and instead is giving Aminat some long Naomi Campbell-style waves. I don't know if this means that Tyra is working out her issues or that she secretly hates Aminat. Miss J. quite hilariously takes Aminat's weave and wears it like an old-school Sonny and Cher fur vest. Aminat's response? "Questionable, Miss J. Questionable behavior." Miss J. works it like the weavologist's layaway payment is due tomorrow. Aminat loves her new hair.
Tyra then totally, and deservedly, insults Kortnie by saying, "Kortnie. Gosh, she's tan. And there's not much I can do about that." At least she didn't just bust out with, "Kortnie. She's fat and orange as befits a Nascar fan." Kortnie gets red hair, which I don't think bodes well. Tyra loves London's bone structure, and so is giving her short blonde hair. And by blonde she means "the color of pissy snow." She looks a lot different, but says that she believes change -- even drastic change -- is good. And then there's Natalie. The Jays go at her with scissors and Natalie stops them. She says she knows it's going to be extremely short, and she's not comfortable with that. Oooh. They might as well kick her off right now because she's going to be, as Dorothy "Tootie" Ramsay would say, "Truh-buuuuuulllllll." Jay tells Natalie that when she says "wait" to John she's also saying "wait" to Tyra. And Tyra waits for no one, except the mother ship that promised to come back for her. Miss J. orders, "Cut her hair." Natalie moves her head away and says, "I can't, dude, I can't." Fo, with her little boy cut, gives the "this ho is trippin'" look. John divas that he can't do this and storms off as we head to commercials.