America's Next Top Model

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Woman Warriors

With that, the judges deliberate. Hannah's picture works, because she does look crazy and is emoting. ALT says that in a way, it's almost Alice in Wonderland but doesn't quite get there. ALT has also created a narrative for Molly's photo, which is that she's a deranged socialite who has just come home from a funeral, and who has perhaps not signed the right prenup and so is uncertain if she got all of her dead husband's money. ALT's world of imagination is full of a lot of deranged socialites, I think. In any case, he loves the photo. Jaclyn's shot is genius, she looks stunning, and she's raised her game. Eric says that Jaclyn is a sweet little Southern girl, but she managed to turn it out in Psycho world and wound up with one of the best shots of the day. Mikaela was not great, and didn't look crazy for anything but being a dullard. Kasia was really into the shoot and using her body and props in a high fashion way, according to Eric. ALT says that her photo is neither commercial nor high editorial, but he's a fan of Kasia because she's fiercely fabulous.

Alexandria has not, according to ALT, come up to the challenge in her photo, but she did come up to the challenge of bitchy housemates with dignity. Nigel thinks that the photo is great, but the stuffed fox is emoting more crazy eyes than Alexandria is. Brittani did not show madness for shoes in her photo, but Nigel says that she has extraordinary bone structure and you see model when you look at her. However, you have to be able to model as well. The noun and the verb, always. Tyra asks the other judges what they think of Brittani's performance as a human. As a HUMAN! Do we really want to get into what we all think of an individual's performance as a human, Miss Banks? ALT says that he doesn't know what's going on behind the scenes, but it should not come into the workplace. Eric says that it changed his opinion on Brittani. Tyra says that a lot of young girls think that the opposite of being fake is rudeness. But rudeness is bad, too! You can't just say whatever is on your mind in whatever stank way you please because it's the truth. ALT wonders if Brittani has learned a life lesson today. Nigel hopes that she has, and says he'd like to have faith in everyone. Eric notes that it took courage for Brittani to stand in front of panel while in the midst of a panic attack, which may show some sort of character.

Meanwhile, backstage, Alexandria tells all of the other girls that they might want her to go home, but she's still in it. She adds, "You should have came to me." Uh, sic. And do you really think that inviting more stank is a good idea at this point? Alexandria does, and asks if any of the girls have a problem with her now. Kasia says that Alexandria has like five personalities, and Mikaela adds that she was offended by how rude Alexandria was to people on set. Hannah simply says, "We want you to go home." Alexandria says that that's fine, and if the others had just said that before she could have stopped talking to them way back when. She adds that they shouldn't have been "fakely nice" to her, and Brittani retorts that it wasn't fakely nice. Alexandria continues that she looks like an asshole now, because she's said so many nice things about the others. Yes, that's totally why she looks like an asshole. Way to invent a personal narrative that allows you to continue to eschew any sense of self-awareness. She says that everyone has put on a fa├žade like they're okay with her, when really they should have just been honest. I actually feel like they've been pretty much upfront about how little they enjoy her company. Brittani starts getting upset again, and Alexandria calmly adds, "You should have just been real with me girl." Brittani freaks out again and leaves, and Alexandria has the gall to look shocked. I still don't think that Alexandria has great reserves of brain power, but do think she has tapped into the fact that Brittani is easily set off. FYI, the girls' holding room is, like, a basement closet. Elegance!

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America's Next Top Model




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