America's Next Top Model

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Woman Warriors

Today, Jay wants the girls to show him how crazy for fashion they really are. He sends them back to hair and makeup, and eventually meets them there to introduce photographer Miguel Starcevich, whom we are told is a very creative and avant-garde photographer. We know that by his depression-era hat. Jay wants the girls to be able to use the shoot as a cathartic moment to push through their competitive anxiety. He then introduces Eric Daman, who is the stylist for Gossip Girl and will be styling the girls today. Jaclyn is beside herself, as evidenced by her repeated exclamation of, "Oh my goodness!" I think this would have been a good time to bust out a "Jeepers creepers!" Eric says that he wants the clothes for today to convey a character. Whoa, he totally is a genius! I'm sure no regular non-genius costume designer ever would have thought of such a thing. Jay explains that each girl will be crazy for some element of fashion, such as fur, bags, or shoes. There will be metaphorical and literal craziness.

Molly is crazy for accessories, and Eric says that she seems a little awkward because of all the junk she's wearing. Jay tells her not to wear the awkwardness in her photo. She sort of snarls, and Jay tells her that crazy doesn't necessarily mean that you need to growl. Molly bites her ring and poses on the Bates porch, and eventually it sounds like they get a decent shot. Brittani is crazy for shoes, and jumps up and down and squeals to prove it. Miguel tells us that he loved Brittani, who came out kicking and jumping like the Karate Kid. He thinks that she has a great personality. Jay agrees that Brittani has done well, and notes how happy she is on set. She says that she loves shoes. Also maybe she has had Alexandria taxidermied.

Hannah is next up, and wants to make an impression in her very tiny top hat. She's crazy for handbags, and has a little monologue that she does about how much she loves bags and how amazing they are. It's pretty weird. Jay notes that it's a hot, crazy mess. Hannah tells us that she got lost in the theatrics of it all, and when she saw how unhappy Jay was she knew she was in trouble. She still keeps up with the crazy chatter, though. Jay tells her that it's force-fed. To us he says that Hannah went full-on with her interpretation of crazy, but left any ability to model back in hair and makeup.

Jaclyn is crazy for makeup, and looks like a combo of Baby Jane and the guy from A Clockwork Orange. She has lipstick smeared magnificently across her face, and Jay notes that she makes a very convincing crazy person. Kasia is crazy for hair and so plays with a bunch of extensions. Jay likes the fact that she's not afraid to frown and do things that are different. Alexandria is crazy for faux fur. Despite the fact that she has a stuffed animal fox around her neck, Jay tells her that she doesn't really look crazy enough. He asks what makes her crazy, and Alexandria says that it's when people are yelling at her. She notes that the other bitches in the house have done that plenty, and Jay tells her to show what she's got. She starts screaming like an inmate at an asylum, and Jay loves it. Outside, the other girls hear her screams and wish that she was actually being murdered. Molly notes ruefully that she's probably still alive, and also probably isn't going home this week.

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America's Next Top Model

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