America's Next Top Model

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Double Trouble

Jennifer is up next. Nigel thinks that her shot is pretty, but it's not necessarily her best angle. He's also not crazy about the face with the mouth gaping open. However, he thinks there's some power there. Miss J. tells her that she looks a bit stiff, and Ann thinks that her body looks compact and her neck has disappeared. Jennifer tells the judges that she played a lot, and that this particular pose came at the end. At the beginning of the shoot, she says, she did a lot with lifting her skirt out. And she should know by now that Tyra does not want to hear any of your stupid explanation. She gets principal's office voice as she tells Jennifer that she forgets her face. Jennifer was doing a lot of things with the skirt, but it looked like her focus was gone. And playing with your skirt can make you look like amateur hour. However, Jennifer's skin looks beautiful. Tyra hates admitting it, but a tan looks great on Jennifer. A fake tan, because sun kills. Just look at Laura!

Laura is next, and Tyra congratulates her on winning the challenge. She does not congratulate Laura on yet another terrible outfit. Poor Laura. It doesn't seem to break her spirit, though. Laura's best shot looks freaking crazy. Not in a good way. I'm sorry, but her body looks disjointed from her head, and she appears to have a fat lip and to be watching in a daze as she boils your bunny. But the judges love it! Tyra says that it looks very Rachel Hunter. If Rachel Hunter were a psychopath. Miss J. tells Laura that she has many faces, and says that from day one he thought she was the gold tooth in a mouthful of decay. If you're going to go with hillbilly metaphors, I guess it could be worse. What he means is that Laura pops in front of the camera. Nigel thinks that Laura's photo could be a Sports Illustrated cover shot. That being said, she has to be careful with her legs, which look stumpy. Ann loves the impact that Laura has with her facial features. Tyra says that Laura is not only smizing, but using all of the muscles in her face. Miss J. calls this "smozing" -- smizing and posing. Okay, ENOUGH. The OED can't handle it. And I have to say again -- and you know that I a) have an unbelievable bias; b) think Laura is the greatest, which is really just an extension of having an unbelievable bias -- this is not a good picture.

Nicole is the last to go. Oooh, pretty. Her face looks great. Nigel says it's all about the stunning close-up. However, on the wide shot it's a bit weak. It's true that her body is sort of lost in a pile of yellow gauze. I would be that she had some better body shots, but this one is certainly good enough to get her to the final two. Nigel notes that Nicole used to be all about the movement, but has lost that recently in her legs. Ann likes Nicole's vulnerability, and enjoys the strong emotion in the picture. Tyra says that there's tenderness, mystery, and sexiness all rolled up into one red-headed wrathful goddess. Even though it's understated, she thinks that Nicole is modeling H2T. Nigel disagrees, noting that it's H2W. With "W" being waist of course. Or waste.

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America's Next Top Model

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