America's Next Top Model
High Fashion Highlights

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There's never a dull moment at the Top Model house, and especially not when they have a primo view of Venice Beach. Jane is just walking around the house when Lexie yells that there's a naked man streaking on the beach. Given that this is Venice Beach, Jane tells us that there's a good chance this naked man is also crazy, so she runs to see what's up. Everyone gathers around to watch as the butt-naked dude rolls around in the sand, and then squats as two unfortunate female police officers have to deal with him. Finally, the officers somehow get him laid out on the back of their SUV, and Lexie deems it the best people watching they've ever had.

Ann is a native Texan and, despite her bone-thin frame, was an aficionado of southern delicacies such as the fried Oreo. I didn't even know you could make those homemade! Here's the recipe: take a double-stuffed Oreo, dip it in pancake batter, then fry it up in a pan of vegetable oil. Ann says that they're really good, because the cookie turns soft. I can't claim that I've ever had a deep-fried Oreo, but I can see the appeal. I don't hate on fried anything. Kacey admits that the deep-fried Oreo is pretty delish. The others wonder if this is her strategy to fatten them up. Seriously, only if you have Ann's metabolism can you have that shit for dinner.

Obviously, these girls need some nutritional guidance, and who better to give it to them than healthy supermodel Karolina Kurkova? She has vegetables and fruit and puts them all in a shake. Visions of deep-fried Oreos dance in the models' heads. It's hard to doubt Karolina's wisdom, when she still looks like she's 17. Kacey says that she'd rather have the deep-fried Oreo, but now that she's a model she has to make the right choices, at least on film.

And then it's time for some never-before-seen footage from the conveyor belt runway challenge! Miss J. tries to give the girls some advice on their walks. He tells Jane that she walks like she's afraid and needs to pick up her pace. That's not exactly super-thrilling advice, and frankly you should be afraid when you're walking in heels on a conveyor belt. We see Chelsey stumble like Gumby, and Liz almost breaking an ankle, and Lexie teetering and tottering, and Jane falling down the stairs once she gets off of the moving runway. It was bad times, and exemplifies why you have to sign away your life to be on a reality show -- because they try to kill you.

The next photo shoot had everybody ready to rumble as the girls posed with crazy characters from Lucha VaVoom wrestling. Photographers Moshe and Eddie Brakha were on hand to make everyone feel creeped-out. Jane tried to capture the necessary aggression during her shoot, but instead gave pin-up girl. Lexie, meanwhile, looked like a homeless transvestite country singer hooker, or at least like she had homeless transvestite country singer hooker style. She was understandably eliminated.

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America's Next Top Model




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