America's Next Top Model
America's Next Top Model

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Potes: B- | 541 USERS: B-
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Spice Up Your Tooch

When we return, Kyle has maybe stop, dropped and pooped. Azmarie enters the bathroom to try to calm her down and get her to refocus. We see Seymone's individual shoot, and Jessica is impressed at the sassiness she brings to it all. Then there's Azmarie. Jay says that she's talented and has a great look, but needs to keep her ego in check. In the world of fashion, he says, your attitude will spread like a brush fire and then no one will touch you no matter how great you are. And from the glimpses we see of Azmarie doing her verse, I think she actually was pretty great. Shoulda worn the butt pads, lady. Kyle is next, and continues to appear vacant and dead with Grave's disease. Laura notes that Kyle brought the team down as a whole, and says that she'll be beyond pissed if Kyle's mistake sends her home. Then there's Eboni, who brings 30-Never with corresponding pigtails to her shot. Jay tells us that Laura is so engaging even when she's in the background that she steals the attention of the viewer. This is a good thing when you're in a competition. And that's a wrap!

Back at home, there is Tyra Mail of Doom. Someone is going home. Kyle confessionalizes that everyone did a good job on the video shoot except her, and she has a bad feeling about panel. Azmarie is also nervous, mostly because of ToochGate 2012. The Brits are feeling comparatively confident. They haven't won a whole lot during this competition, but they clearly feel like they deserve a victory in this case. With that, there's yet another commercial! We clearly need a breather before we are assaulted with the full-length videos for these songs.

When we return, it's panel time! Tyra is wearing a sparkly evening gown, as befits a week focused on tooching. There are prizes, there are judges. Jessica Sutta and Nadine Coyle are the guest judges. We first see the full video for the United Sirens of America's smash hit, "Stop, Drop and Tooch." With lyrics such as, "Our booty tooch / be raisin' roofs," I think we can assume that both a Grammy and genre-busting Pulitzer Prize are coming Lisa D'Amato's way. What can I say, she's a poet. The production on the video is, I think, designed to induce a seizure. And the collective direction to the "vocalists" seems to have been something like, "Do your best to whine this line." Oy. So, Laura really is a standout in the video, and Kyle is particularly horrible, just as we suspected.

The Americans have their single takes reviewed by the panel, and Seymone is first. Nigel says that she owned it, and likes that she was a little bitchy and a little off. Jessica Sutta adds that Seymone looked beautiful. Tyra says that the song is like a cartoon, and Seymone needed to exaggerate and push it a bit more. She was close, though! Laura is next, and Tyra enjoys her crazy, zaggy self. Nigel thinks that she had a nice oscillation between pretty and crazy. Cutrone also compliments Laura on her nasty, dirty, punk aesthetic. Good job, overall! I'm sure Alan's ear is proud, wherever it is. [Cue music for "Somewhere Out There."]

America's Next Top Model

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