Oh, and then there's Azmarie. Nigel doesn't think that she committed to this video at all. Cutrone doesn't get Azmarie's vocal weirdness. And then Tyra has something to say. As you may suspect, it has nothing to do with the video that they just watched. Nay, Tyra would like to talk about the booty tooch teach, and Azmarie's refusal to cross the training tooch line. This didn't make sense to Tyra, as Azmarie was willing to humiliate and degrade herself in a whole host of other ways, while being covered in maple syrup. Azmarie says that, after some thought, she wants to apologize to Tyra and realizes that she was being disrespectful. Tyra claims to accept the apology, but I think we all know that's really not true. She does point out that Azmarie's stand was just weird rather than meaningful.
Eboni is next, and Nigel tells her that she committed too much, and has to know where her moments are. Tyra accuses Eboni of smoochie tooching while singing, which I think is actually quite a feat. Cutrone wanted Eboni to be more of a robot girly baby, but Jessica thinks she was working some babydoll girl band realness. And then there's Kyle. If the words, "Hi! I'm Kyle / I smile for miles" don't haunt your nightmares, then you haven't seen this episode. Nigel does a pretty dead-on impression of Kyle whining her lyrics, and tells her that she could have chilled out a little bit more. Jessica likes it, though Nadine tells Kyle that she has dead eyes. Tyra reminds Kyle that everyone else was better than her.
We then mercifully move on to the Fiercely British's single, "We'll Mash You Up." Their British tooch is major. Your hoochie tooch? No flavor. Oh, I see -- the booty tooch teach was critical in actually being able to properly understand the really deep lyrics to this song! Maybe it's actually a pop tribute to the work of Camus. The Brits are way cuter in their video, but I think they're way cuter always. Also, their song contains the word "scallywags," which gives them an automatic win, yeah yeah. Neither of these songs holds a candle to "Money Can't Buy You Class," though. Alisha is extra great for the Brits, and really uses her legs to full advantage. But everyone is good! They tooch high, they tooch low, our Yankee tooch is too slow. The panel goes nuts, and Tyra says that she felt like she was watching a real music video. Now, let's not get carried away here.