America's Next Top Model

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Let's Go See the City

The girls head to a building that we soon learn is the headquarters for Sao Paulo Fashion Week. They meet Paulo Borges, who is the Sao Paulo Fashion Week Director. Perhaps the whole city was named after him and his fabulous Charles Nelson Reilly glasses? Paulo has a translator named Fabienne Muzy. That is my new favorite name ever! It implies that you are both fabulous and muzy. And while I don't know what muzy actually means, I'm sure it's something awesome. Try it: "My, but you're looking muzy today in that caftan!" Fabienne tells them that today they'll emulate the life of a real working model by going on go-sees! Most of the girls are visibly excited, but Allison interviews that the news made her want to die a little bit. She gets very nervous, and her weave makes her look like the Bride of Chucky, so she is not looking forward to the experience. Seriously, can you imagine a real model going to meet with a designer with that hair? Fabienne tells the girls that the top designers in Sao Paulo are looking for a girl with style, personality, and soul. Too bad that Tyra has already contractually taken their souls. Celia tells us that this challenge is set apart from the others because this is business, and this is serious. I love the implicit statement that every other stupid challenge they have to do is, in fact, bullshit. Celia continues that they'll be seeing five designers and have to impress them, because ultimately the designers give the job. Fabienne translates for Paulo that the girls may go to all five designers in any order, but they have to meet Paulo at an address designated on their map by 3:30. Oh, which stupid bitch is going to fuck it up this time? Taxis are waiting outside, which makes me miss the days when the girls would be forced to set out on their own and get groped on the subway, or catch a ride with vespa drivers with whom they'd have cheating sex later on in the evening.

So, to recap: five designers, a taxi and a map, be back by 3:30. It appears that they have four hours total. The girls all rush off to their cabs and discover that Sao Paulo has some serious traffic. Aminat says that it's worse than New York and L.A. put together, which, she notes, is ridonkulous. Celia's strategy is to start with the designer who's farthest away and then work backwards. Smart. Teyona apparently has the same idea, as she arrives at the same designer just after Celia. As she sees Celia enter the building, she decides to move on somewhere else since, and I quote, "I'm not trying to wait for anybody, they need wait for me." And, in case you're wondering, Teyona doesn't even get out of bed for less than $10.00 a day. Celia meets designer Adriana Degreas, who asks how old she is. She is honest about being 25. One might think her age would help her in this instance, where she is strutting in an orange Golden Girls-inspired caftan. Caio Campos, translator for Adriana Degreas, tells us that Celia has everything it takes to be a supermodel. However, she is on death's door. It's a problem. But Adriana is not afraid of a visit from the Grim Reaper and would still book her. Celia is wearing that great gold poufy skirt, which I'm sure only helps her case.

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America's Next Top Model

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