America's Next Top Model

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A House Divided

Alasia slams the door of the confessional booth shut and says, "Do y'all see that, though?" Alasia is amused yet offended that Raina was just in there talking shit about her and then was all, "Hey girl, how you doin'?" As Alasia says, "Noooooooo! Don't say nothin' to me! That is fake!" As Alasia goes on about how Raina runs her dang mouth and needs to shut up, Raina stands outside the confessional door and eavesdrops in turn. She then calls Jessica and Brenda up, and there's a big listening party. And just in time for Alasia to say, "That's how girls get beat up where I'm from! Runnin' they mouth. I want them to come to my hood." Presumably to get beat up. Alasia ends her monologue by saying, "Y'all fake. The end. We ain't gonna discuss it." Jessica and Raina do a silent Alasia-from-the-hood interpretive dance outside while all this is happening.

Back in the bedroom of doom, Raina tells Alasia that they heard some of what she said in her confessional, and it's kind of creeping them out. You know, if Alasia was ever going to pop a bitch, now might be the time. Alasia tells us that the other girls were really trying to kill her confidence and bring her down. But she's not here for them, and will persevere. With this message of hope amidst the drama, we head to commercials.

When we return, there is Tyra Mail: "it's time 2 take ur campaign underground. Love, Tyra." Several girls think they're going to go to the subway. Alasia hopes not, because it smells like pee down there. Once again, you can't fault her logic. The girls do indeed head down to the subway, and there's no one there. Eventually the train comes and it features Jay, photographer Mike Ruiz, and last season's winner Nicole! This is going to be their first Cover Girl shoot. You know Brenda is looking at Nicole's gorgeous, long, red locks and having to stifle the whine. Nicole shills for Cover Girl's Smoky Shadow Blast, which is the product of the season. I kind of want to get one, to be honest with you. When I give myself a smoky eye it often takes at least three steps, so the promise to do it in two intrigues me. The girls will be styled as "New York women." Angelea says that she's from Buffalo, and she's got this. Hair, makeup, and the photo shoot are all going to be on the train. Luxury in a pee-infused metal box!

Makeup artist Vincent Oquendo does a good job of shilling the product as he applies it. Meanwhile, Angelea talks to Nicole about life on America's Next Top Model, and asks how she dealt with all the drama in the house. Nicole simply says that she stayed out of it, and you just can't add to it. Even if the other girls drive you nuts, she says, you should keep it professional. Angelea interprets this as saying what you need to say and then walking away. Nicole adds, "Stay classy, you know?" Oh, rookie Nicole. It's like she hasn't even lived through a season of this show at all. Brenda, of course, runs out of the subway car and onto the platform to share this overheard conversation with Jessica. They think it's hilarious that Nicole's advice was to stay classy, given this crew. I guess I did, too, so I can't fault them for it. Also, way to not add to the drama per Nicole's advice, Brenda and Jessica!

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America's Next Top Model




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