MONDO EXTRAS

Sooner than you can say Camilla Parker Bowles, it's time for the girls' first photo shoot. They get to hit the slopes -- an indoor ski slope, that is -- where they suit up in bikinis. Stylist Hilary Alexander, who I totally want to have a beer with, by the way, is there to tell them that bikinis in the snow and fur coats when it's 35 degrees (Celsius!) in the shade -- that's fashion! She checks out Tamar's ass and notes that she's worried about Lianna because of her teeth. The photographer notes that her jaw is a problem as well. Lisa tells us that rule number one of a sexy bikini shoot is to be careful not to overdo it. With this, the photographer yells, "Don't open it so much!" to Abigail. I wish we could take up a world-wide collection to have him follow Britney Spears around and just yell that at her all day. Rule number two, which Yvette demonstrates, is that you have to be careful not to underdo it. The photographer thinks she looks like a frightened rabbit. In a bikini, next to a snowboard. That's something that I really don't want to ever see.

Back at home, some of the other girls call out Sophia and Abigail for being cliquey. Lianna says that she doesn't want to be in their "it crowd," and later notes that she can't stand Sophia. Jasmia says that there are going to be groups and to leave it, but then interviews later that she wouldn't mind it if Sophia or Abigail went. With this, the girls head to their first panel. Lisa runs down the prizes: a contract with Models 1 and a six-page spread plus the front cover of Company Magazine. I assume that this isn't a magazine, like, about companies. Or entertaining company or something. Who knows, though? In any case, the girls seem very excited about it. Lianna gets a mixed review on her bikini photo. Jasmia looked like a young girl dressing up in her mothers' clothes in the runway show. The photographer hates the whole look of Yvette's photo and everything about it, and he shot it, so that's saying something. In the end, Yvette and Jasmia are the final two and Yvette gets canned. She looks kind of pretty as she leaves. Asha says that she felt sorry for Yvette, but also not sorry, because she didn't want to get eliminated either. Yvette says that she's going to go home for a rest for a few days, and then get a portfolio done and go out and prove everyone wrong. Oh, please. She'll just end up on the Island of Misfit Models with the rest of them. Commercials.