Union Jacked Up
When we return, Lisa tells us that the next day posed two challenges: look good in a trash bag (ha!) and learn to deal with distractions on the catwalk. So the girls outfit themselves in garbage bags and walk dogs down some sort of makeshift runway on a track. You know what there are a lot of in this scene? Bitches. And also pixilated bits! Apparently, it was a very windy day, and to have clean lines on your garbage dress you must forego underwear entirely. Abigail's dog is apparently particularly unruly. She says that she let herself down because she wasn't focused enough. Some girls do better than others, and mostly it's dependent on how good the dogs are, or not. I like to think that the dogs' animal instincts have led them to sabotage the nasty ones.
Next, it's time for a really hot, '40s inspired butch/femme shoot. Two girls pose together, one in a suit and another in a gown. First there's Tamar and Sophia, who do very well. Then there's Lucy and Georgina, who get some good feedback. Jasmia and Amber also seem to get good feedback, and then there's Sam, Asha and Sarah. Wait, who's Sam with? Maybe she's by herself. Lianna says that she wanted to be with Nina because she thought she'd help her. But, in fact, Nina did not help her, and Lianna seems incensed that Nina sees this whole thing as a full-on competition. I might make that same assumption, given that it's a modeling COMPETITION. Dumb ass. Nina also appears to be topless. Woo!
After the photo shoot, it was time for makeovers! Lisa meets the girls and introduces them to the stylist. Nothing really radical seems to happen, except that Tamar is going from blonde to chocolate brown. She says that she is shocked. However, as Lisa points out, none of the girls has a choice in their makeovers, and before they know it, they are totally transformed! Or, in most cases, barely transformed. You know, same thing. Lianna tells us that Sophia didn't like her cut or color, and that she felt like a 50 year old woman whose marriage is failing, thus prompting her to get a makeover. Actually, that's a pretty accurate assessment. As she's crying, Sophia tries to convince Lisa that she really likes the cut and color, but just has to get used to it. For my money, the best makeover is Sam, who goes from boring blonde to an angular red cut. Everyone else seriously looks the same. Or, like, maybe they've had their hair blown out for the prom at the salon where their cousin works. Also, it appears that Jasmia's previously-believed herpe is actually a mole. Is herpe (singular) a word? It sounds kind of weird. Come to think of it, can you have just one herpe? Note that if you email me an answer with some sort of first-hand knowledge about this issue, I'll probably think less of you.