America's Next Top Model
Episode Report CardPotes: B+ | Grade It Now!
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The next morning, the girls go to the Isle of Wight for their first location shoot. The Isle of Wight ferry is called "WightLink." Hee! The U.K. is adorable! They once again meet stylist Hilary Alexander, who tells them that they'll be wearing skimpy summer dresses, even though it looks somewhat wintry out. Photographer Nicky Johnston says that they don't want to hear any whinging about how cold it is. The girls seem to be doing pretty well, until we get to Edwina. According to Hilary, Edwina was sassing her and telling her which outfit she wanted to wear. Hilary was all, "Bitch, I don't think so," and Edwina kept on complaining. Hilary is not psyched. Edwina also complains about having to pose in the ocean in the cold. At one point during her shoot, Nicky yells, "Horrendous!" Ha! Hilary says that Edwina could be good, but that she's becoming "a little madame." I love when they speak British! A split starts in the group as Naomi and Edwina make some enemies. Jenilee tells us that Naomi and Edwina were laughing at her, because she was wearing a dress Edwina wanted to wear. Jenilee tells us that that is "pafetic." It does seem kind of stupidly bitchy. Shauna wasn't happy with her look, which included a dress that was too big and a stupid hat and was quite milkmaid-esque overall. As Shauna was unimpressed with her style, Nicky was unimpressed with Shauna. But it was Claire who really failed to inspire him: "Pretty face...plank of wood." He calls her lifeless, and says that hers was the worst shot of the day. At the end of the day, Claire and Anne of the hair histrionics are in the bottom two. Claire's issue is apparently her posture, which Lisa says the judges aren't convinced will change over time. Okay, that's lamer than just about anything Tyra's come up with. Just tell her to stand up straight! And everyone's just tired of Anne's melodramatic outbursts. Claire gets booted, which is fitting, since she looks like a twelve-year-old boy. She's excited to go home and see her boyfriend, Phil, and happy to get back to her normal life, because she's had enough of this "modeling malarkey." Hee! Lisa tells us that looking good isn't the only important part of being a model: you also have to move beautifully. So the girls are sent to see choreographer Andy Turner. He's cute! Some girls -- pretty much the black ones, if we are to believe the camerawork and years of stereotypes -- find their rhythm right away. The pastiest of the whiteys can't quite get it, though. Stephanie has a really hard time. She says that she was getting "frus-TRA-ted" and couldn't do it. But when it came time to film some sort of cheesy video -- perhaps for Lisa Butcher's breakout hit single, "Shake Your Bollocks (Bollocks)" -- no one failed to perform. On a pole! Seriously, it's all stripper-y. Lindsay Lohan would approve.
America's Next Top Model