America's Next Top Model

Episode Report Card
Potes: B+ | 1032 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
Calling All Angels

Liz is first for evaluation. She explains that she was able to stand on her male model's shoulders due to a harness that was squeezing the mess out of her. Literally, the mess. Patricia doesn't think that her body shows power, though her face does. Tyra says that she's worn the types of harnesses that the girls used, and they kill. However, she can't tell that Liz is in pain. ALT delivers the non-compliment, "For you, I think it's a very good."

Chelsea is next, with her mysterious photo. ALT says that the mystery is on its way, if not there quite yet. He loves how her hand is clasping the male model behind his ear, and Tyra says that even though the male model is hot, Chelsey still steals the show. That's very good for anybody. Esther's fearless photo befuddles Nigel, who says that it looks more like a movie still, but a non-cinematic one. He adds that the male model is doing nothing, but looks genius. Making things worse, Esther's face was the same in every single shot, rendering her a virtual non-entity. That's not good news.

Jane is supposed to look like a scorned angel, but ALT thinks she looks more awkward and uncomfortable. Tyra says that this was the only remotely scorned shot, and it almost seemed like Jane didn't know what the word meant. Tyra always likes to get digs in at the Ivy Leaguers. Nigel doesn't understand her twisted body. I will also add that she looks like she has a mutant arm. However her face is very pretty.

As Kacey approaches the panel, ALT tells her that she has on too much fashion. It turns out that a giant, gaudy blob on her chest is actually part of her shirt. Patricia Field fires back, "You shouldn't have bought the shirt." ALT is pleased that Kacey now has contacts. He is not, however, pleased with her picture, which is flat. He loves how she's positioned her feet and arm, but it's not enough. Pat Field adds that it would be a pretty dance move, but this is in fact not a choreographed piece or dance-related shoot.

When Lexie's predatorial photo pops up Nigel asks, "What's up with the legs?" Lexie explains that she was trying to make it look like she was taking the male model away. Nigel acts both shocked and disgusted at her posing failure. Tyra tells Lexie that not one frame in her film looked remotely predatorial. Nigel adds that the male model has again stolen the shot. Tyra says that Kacey looks more predatorial in her photo, and asks Lexie if she sees the difference. Basically, almost everyone is stinking up this shoot.

Sara is next, and Nigel can only say, "I mean, really?" when her seductive angel photo appears. Pat Field is amazed that so many poses look like dance moves, and conjectures that the models might have been copying each other. Sara unwisely says that, at the time, this is what was easiest for everyone to do. Nigel points out that modeling is not easy, and Vogue Italia is not easy, and no one can afford to be easy. Tyra thinks that Sara looks like an amateur ballet dancer, and ALT says that it lacks aspiration and inspiration. Bad bad bad bad bad. Needless child-abandoning bad, in fact.

America's Next Top Model

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