America's Next Top Model

Episode Report Card
Potes: B+ | 1313 USERS: B-
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Crouching Tyra, Hidden Drag Queen

Jennifer is up next, and chooses weapons that have both hooking and stabbing apparatuses. Where do you get those things? I'd like to have one around, just in case I need it someday. Jay loves Jennifer, and gives her tons of praise on her shoot. Because she sort of looks like she has a ninja robotic eye, and that's fierce. Erin is next, and Jay tells us that she worked it and was dynamic, all while looking like a magical flying elf. She's such a pill, but she looks great. Laura has "Get In Shape, Girl!" nunchucks, which she says will make her look long, lean and pretty. Indeed, they work for her on the ground, but she has some problems in the air. Once she gets it figured out, though, she's golden, and Jay gives her props for taking on one of the most difficult weapons. And can I just step back for a minute and ask what the fuck was up with "Get In Shape Girl"? You want to get in shape, girl? Join a softball team. No sneaker pom-poms required.

Backstage, Nicole tells Kara, who's in the makeup chair, that when she has smoky eyes her eyes look burnt. Okay, so maybe she does have the social graces of a fetus. Or maybe it's a warning. Kara laughs in her face, and once again complains about how well Nicole is doing. She says that if Nicole is doing well in this competition, that she's obviously going to suck, because she's nothing like Nicole. Nicole again says that Kara looks like her face got burnt to a crisp. Sundai just blinks rapidly, says "wow," and makes a mental note to remove all matches from the house. Kara is next with the sword, and tells us that she doesn't care for weapons at all. Except when they're used to cut off sheep testicles. Kara's performance is a bit messy, and Jay calls her out on not listening to Deborah's weapons instruction. He tells her that the grace is in those movements. Up in the air, Kara tells us that whatever she did wasn't going to look good. That's the attitude. Jay reiterates that her performance was weak.

America's Next Top Model

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